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TOEFL: Does Television destroy our bonds with friends and family?


sabrinayaa 12 / 22  
Mar 9, 2011   #1
Topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television has destroyed communication among friends and family. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

It seems that the main entertainment after working and studying for some people is to throw themselves into a sofa and enjoy the rest of a day, keeping away themselves with outdoor socializing. Consequently, some critics claim that television has destroyed communication among people. Although television has been somewhat harmful in its effects, I hold the view that it has hardly "destroyed" communication among friends and family.

The advert of television, on the one hand, actually provides people topics that can be discussed in their leisure time. To some extend, it has increased the communication among people. A diversity of programs on the screen makes the lives of people more colorful. Titanic had brought a worldwide uproar by its extolling and of fascinating immortal love, audiences would exchange their feeling when they meet, which giving them a difference of perspectives as well as enhancing the relationship between people.

On the other hand, the communication among individuals is influenced by a various of factors, and it is hardly to assert that it was television that inhibited the interaction of people. Human beings are nowadays exposed to a vast amount of information source, such as internet and telephone, even though television still plays a significant role in people's daily lives, others mass media have invaded people's life and granted people more choices. It is also found that the number of people traveling has gone up faster and faster, which means people would rather spend their leisure time traveling with their family or friends. This trend, as far as I am concerned, could be a reminder that the emotional exchange of people has been forged.

Admittedly, television would bring some bad impacts, which some people could not escape. For instance, too much spending time watching television would cause some people another day waste, they shut doors and immerse themselves into programs. In this case, these people might be decrease their time spent with family. However, it seems to me that even television were not existent, surely these people would have found other escapes.

In conclusion, as I mentioned earlier, people have very little time for anything today in modern society, television is merely among many other factors that affect communication, and is definitely not the main cause of degradation. Therefore, I do not agree that television has destroyed communication among friends and family.
Y529 2 / 6  
Mar 9, 2011   #2
1.The advert of television-->advent or advert??

2.a vast amount of information source
-->a vast amount of information or a vast number of sources

3.it seems to me that even television

I think your framework is pretty good.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Mar 12, 2011   #3
I hold the view that it has hardly "destroyed" communication among friends and family.

Looking good, but at the end of this first paragraph instead of just stating your position it would be great to give a phrase that expresses something about the reason for your opinion. :-)

For instance, too much spending time watching television would cause some people to waste their whole day as they shut doors and immerse themselves into programs.

However, it seems to me that even if television were not existent, surely these people would have found other escapes.---Good point! You are smart. Did you see the word I added?

In conclusion, as I mentioned earlier, people have very little time for anything today in modern society, and television is merely among one factor among many other factors th at affect communication, and it is definitely not the main cause of degradation.

:-) nice job!!
Ishilied - / 1  
Mar 12, 2011   #4
Looks structurally sound, with a few minor grammatical issues.

I do have a suggestion: look at you're opposition some more. One what grounds are their claims based?

One what grounds are your claims based?
OP sabrinayaa 12 / 22  
Mar 18, 2011   #5
Hi Ishilied

What did you mean by saying that? Should I pay attention to the oppsite argument or something?
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Mar 22, 2011   #6
That's always great advice. When you argue, show the opponent and audience that you do understand their reasoning and explain why your reasoning is better.

Google this: Rogerian argument.

:-)


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