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Technology is very helpful in solving one's problem but one can become too dependent upon using it


shwetanana 2 / 3  
Aug 5, 2015   #1
As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems,the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate.

Everything have pros and cons.Its human job that which side we choose.Technology is very helpful in solving one's problem but at a same time it is somehow deteriorating us.

Technology gives great enhancement in our living .Now,most of the people have vacuum cleaner,dish washer etc.They give us great comfort but at a same time deteriorating our health.By doing household work we perform some exercise which helps us keeping our health good.

Technology makes one's life easier but on the other hand it is also a major factor of Green house effect. Industrial revolution is one of the greatest revolution for mankind.But machines and tools that are used in industries are causing pollution.

Increasing use of machines also brings unemployment.During 1990's,In India with the arrival of computer in workplace many people loose their job as they does not know how to operate computers.Industrialist should thought about these employee and helped them in enhancing their skills.

Technology is not only about machines and tools it is also about gun, missile,atom bomb etc.No doubt,they increase power and pride of a country but they also bring devastated condition.We all know about Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

Technology is important for us.It is crucial for human.Human is most developed species and can help in making this earth a better place to live for all everyone.We should use and rely on technology but at the same time should hear to our inner soul and use technology for the benefit of everyone.
lcturn87 - / 435 236  
Aug 6, 2015   #2
Hello, I would like to help you with your essay. I would like to help you with organizing your paper and forming paragraphs.

I think the first sentence is your thesis. The next few sentence seem to be your introduction. Let me help you organize this paragraph and give you some corrections.

"Everything in life have pros and cons.Its As humans job that we decide which side we choose. For example, technology is very helpful in solving one's problem but one can become too dependent upon using it. at a same time it is somehow deteriorating us . As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems,the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate.

The words in bold indicate that you needed a transition word (For example) and a more specific way to show how technology is deteriorating (become too dependent).

The next paragraph could possibly be deleted. This paragraph relates to physical health and not humans ability to think for themselves.

When you begin this paragraph, use a transition word by changing the order of the words:
On the other hand, although technology makes one's life easier, it is also a major factor of the greenhouse effect. I think there needs to be an explanation regarding how the industrial revolution changed the way people work. Did the machines and tools that were being used during this time cause pollution? Continue this paragraph with this sentence: "Furthermore, the increasing use of machines caused unemployment. During the 1990's, in India, with the arrival of the computer in the workplace, many people lost their jobs because they did not know how to operate computers." End the paragraph with: "Industrialists should have thought about these employees and helped them to enhance their skills."

The following paragraph could possibly be deleted unless you describe how misuse of tools cause humans to react and not think about the consequences.

There are some slight errors that can be corrected to make your conclusion better.

"In conclusion, technology is important for us." It is crucial for human. "Humans are the most...to live for everyone"

Here is a suggestion to end your essay: We should use and rely on technology but at the same time should hear to our inner soul and and use it wisely technology for the benefit of everyone.


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