thanks in advance for reading through my work...
TASK:Some people think that one should retire at the age of 60 or 65. Others say that people should be allowed to work for as long as they want to.
What is your opinion about this?
It is a common practice for most people to stop working at the age of 60 or 65 as it is believed that employees are no longer qualified to do their job beyond these ages. However, recent reports denies this theory, it has been proven that mankind is capable of working even at an older age. In my opinion, anyone should be allowed to work for as long as he desires providing that the individual is still physically fit.
Many employers believe that workers who are 60 years and older, are no longer productive in their job. In addition, they may impose danger not only to themselves but also towards their colleagues. However, this should not be the case and it is not a permissible reason to deny workers' rights. If safety measures are properly observed, it is certain that accidents would be avoided. Furthermore, if management observes that an employee is no longer capable of doing his task, they can choose to send the worker into an improvement plan or reassign the person to a position where he could be more efficient. For example, if a supervisor notices their employee is too old to drive, the person should be transferred to a designation which is lesser prone to danger such as a Document Controller.
Aside from the aspect of productivity at work, people also tend to get more sensitive once they reach seniority. They don't want to be dependent to their children. Moreover, neither do they want to be a burden to their families. Most elderly want to feel their presence is appreciated, especially at the last stages of their lives. Thus, they should not be deprived of this feeling.
In conclusion, I personally think retirement should be a voluntary choice and authorities or employers should be there to aid the needs of workers for them to continue their jobs, instead of discouraging them. A person is deemed to be happier and satisfied if he retires in his own will.
anyone should be allowed to work for as long as he desires providing that the individual is still physically fit
everyone should be allowed to work as long as they desire
an employee is no longer capable of doing his task
employees are no longer capable of doing their tasks
Most elderly want to feel their presence is appreciated
...are appreciated
You should not use he/she in an IELTS essay. Overall, ideas are good.
Hi muffle,
thanks for the suggestions, I do think you were confused of the phrase below...
...are appreciated
subject for the sentence is "their presence"that's why it should be singular...
You should not use he/she in an IELTS essay.
I get your point on this, however I intend to approach this essay on a personal manner since the
whole task is suppose to be my opinion. Thus, I think using the nouns Ď" and "˙our"would still be appropriate.
Don't you think so?
they may impose danger not only to themselves but also towards their colleagues
It would be better if you could give an example of these kinds of danger.
send the worker into an improvement plan or reassign the person to a position where he could be more efficient
What if this employee has no experience or knowledge related to this new position? Will this still affect productivity?
don't
Don't use contraction in your essay.
dependent to
dependent on
want to feel their presence is appreciated
want their presence to be appreciated
I hope this helps!
