Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


IELTS: Petrol price, traffic problems and pollution; Any other effective measures?


Stephen Chen 2 / 3  
Mar 16, 2012   #1
Thank you for helping me improve my writing skill.

Topic:
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.
To what extent do you agree of disagree?
What other measures do you think might be effective?


My essay:
There is a growing worldwide awareness of the need for solving the traffic problems and getting hash conditions better. The price of petrol has been brought into the public concern. Someone believes that the high price of petrol is the key to terminate these two troubles. But i think human should explore more effective ways to control these negative effects.

Money is always treated as a key point to solve social problems. It is no doubt that raising the price of patrol can slow down the growth speed of the cars as well as the pollution generated by firing patrols. More and more single drivers will choose public transport rather than using their own car and traffic problems can be well improved by more effective utilization of transports. On the other hand, industries will control the scale of their productions to avoid firing petrol that is unnecessary.

But every coin has its two sides. We can't solve problems by sacrifice the profit of some parts of the people, especially the poor ones. High price of the petrol will raise the cost of daily life which hurt those poor person. Otherwise, petrol is not the only fuel that is widely used in industry and factories can choose other fuel instead of petrol to reduce their cost. It means that rise price of petrol can't solve the pollution problems perfectly.

Taking into account all these factors, we should not pay more attention to the price of petrol, but search more effective and eco-friendly way to use it. And we also need to adopt complex measures such as improving traffic control system, saving natural resources, creating new kind of energy and so on to help us facing the traffic and environment deterioration.
sharadarige 15 / 25  
Mar 17, 2012   #2
hash conditions ?
firing petrol is not the proper usage.
instead of saying "Single driver" it would be more appropriate to say "Car pooling is one of the option"
rather than using petrol often you can as "fuel prices"
sentence formation could be written much better


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS: Petrol price, traffic problems and pollution; Any other effective measures?
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳