Please check grammar and used in my paragraph.
Narration
Around last March, Fang, Maprang, and I planned to go to Saiyok waterfall in Kanchanaburi. In those time, I wake up lastly so I took a bath very swift. Instantly, my telephone rang and Fang said; "You miss a train. But you can join with us by taking the van, change the motorbike, and catch up the same train in Kanchanaburi station." I accepted her advice and hastily went to the van station. When I near Kanchanaburi that was a relief! So I comfortably chatted in Line group. My friends asked about whereabouts am I and we shared each other location. I laugh Fang about miss sharing location of her. But while the location emerged, I was shocked. We arrived same district that made my heart skip a beat. When I arrived Kanchanaburi station, I hurried to take a motorbike. I bought the train ticket before time up just 5 minutes. I had a deep sigh and text the message to my friends that they were sticking out. The train had been arrive, I saw my friends gesticulate to me and I caught up the train to sit with them. I had to thanks about speed of the Thai train and recommend from my friends.
Exposition
I, like many people, had a problem trying to travel to somewhere, according to missed a train when I traveled to Saiyok waterfall. You will gain a lots of experience from missed a train. For example, I missed a train but I had to find the way that made I can go to see my friends. Firstly, I took the van. Next, I changed the motorbike to train station in Kanchanaburi. Then, I bought the ticket just in time to buy. Finally, I caught up the same train and saw my friends. These was show which I could not to catch up the train in time if I did not know about route, location, or preparing for travel. As a result, preparing for travel is very important.
Definition
"Travel" has a lot of definition. It is depend on experience of others. According to Wikipedia travel is the movement of people between relatively distant geographical locations, and can involve travel by foot, bicycle, automobile, train, boat, airplane, or other means, with or without luggage, and can be one way or round trip. Travel can also include relatively short stays between successive movements. Moreover, travel can entail relaxing; when you travel, you will leave all the worries all behind. In addition, it can also signify learning. Because when you travel, you will learn to live on your own. You will discover by seeing some spectacular things: culture, language, living, and attitude. It make you more instruct and understand about your life and your surroundings.
Description
The train is an absorbing example of travel to Saiyok waterfall by public transportation. The hastiness that you faced in every time are lessen. You can look people and acquire about others. You can comfortably seat and look out the window to view the plentiful natural sideways of Kanchanaburi. You will be immerse with the axenic rude air instead of air condition. Your eyes will contact with the unprocessed color from immature trees, steep mountains, and graceful fields. Sound of literal mechanism and sound of the wild make you feel degage between you on the way to the absolved and caller waterfall. You can disturb these things with a few money or free. When you travel to Saiyok waterfall, Kanchanaburi. Travel by the train is one alternative that you can choose. It make you receive the parvenu experiences that you cannot forgot.
Comparison
The main similarity between the van and the train is that they both are the land transportation. Although the van and the train are land transportation, the van fast to go to the landing place. On one hand, the van is an appropriate transportation to be if you like comfortable. On the other hand, sometimes it is make you feel serious from travel against time. You will relax and be impressed with the natural view from the train. On the train, you can buy food, fruit, and water and you can go to toilet. Conversely, the van do not have anything. Moreover, the van is a very expensive ticket, but many people are inexperience as opposed to the train which is inexpensive, but has a much better view and experience. If you want to speedy transportation to the landing place, or comfortable travel, the van is the land transportation to choose. But if you want to relaxing, intimate the natural, convenient toilet, or free ticket, the train is the land transportation to select.
Narration
- In thoseAt that time, I wake up lastlywoke up late so I took a bath very swiftswiftly .
- When Iwe were near Kanchanaburi that was a relief!
- So I comfortably chatted in Linewith the group.
- My friends asked about my whereabouts am I and we shared each otherothers location
- I laugh with Fang about miss sharing location of her .
- I bought the train ticket before the time up just 5 minutes.just 5 minutes before the the time is up
- The train had been arrive, I saw my friends gesticulate totowards me and I caught up the train to sit with them.
- I had to thanksthankaboutthe speed of the Thai train and therecommendrecommendation from my friends.
Well May, your essay is good it just needs a little bit of polishing and yes your grammar needs help to. Now, I made a few inputs on the first paragraph, use this as a guideline and re-write the rest of the essay,post it back here in EF so we can help you further.
I have a few notes for you;
- tenses, when an action is done use past tense, when its an ongoing action, use the present tense of the verb
- details of your idea, as much as you want to stay detailed in your essay, if its not called for, don't include it in your essay.
We surely look forward for the re-written essay.
Cheers!!!
When we were near Kanchanaburi that was a relief!
why you used from (we)?? I think it is personal opinion and you should better use I.
Exposition
-You will gain a lot of experience from missed a train. For example, I missed a train, but I had to find the way that made I can go to see my friends.
-These have been show, which I could not to catch up the train in time if I did not know about route,
Naph
