Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 5


Modern technology-based products do not improve people's lives


linhtran 1 / -  
Nov 29, 2015   #1
Nowadays, technology is having an increasing effect on people's daily life. however, there are some people who say that modern technology-based products do not improve people's living standard. in my opinion, this is a wrong statement.

First of all, there is no doubt that high-tech products help people to communicate with each other more easily. thanks to the inventions of telephone, computer and especially the Internet, humans can keep in touch from a very long distance. they can also give and receive information through tv or radio programmes, which are considered as products of modern life.

Secondly, due to the improvement of technology, residents have a chance to access to the giant knowledge treasure of human being. For instance, by surfing the Internet, students are able to broaden the horizon of personal experience or enlarge the knowledge of the whole world's life. there is also an evolution in the method of studying. the instructors now don't need to come to class to give lessons, they only need a computer which accesses the internet to communicate with students from all over the world.

In conclusion, it is undeniable that modern technology-based products play an important role in people's lives. However, people need to balance the time using them with the time for outdoor activities and for their real relatives.
akiraaa 7 / 20 2  
Nov 29, 2015   #2
T hanks to the inventions of telephone, computer and especially the Internet, humans can keep in touchwith each otherfrom despite of a very long distance. they can also give send and receive information ...

... residents have a chance to get access to the giant ...
For instance, by surfing on the Internet, students are able ... of the whole world's life .

In conclusion, it is undeniable that modern technology-based products play an important role in people's lives. However, people need to balance the time using them with the time for outdoor activities and for their real relatives.[but you don't mention in the former part??]
Ra_fhli 22 / 17 8  
Nov 30, 2015   #3
HI Linthran, I am pleased to know you here. I have read your writing, almost minor flow. However, I Have some suggestion for you to increase your writing mainly in punctuation Another thing is, when you upload your essay in this site, you should consider enclosing the question in order to make your reader easy to follow and examine your idea.

Anyway here my suggestion for you:

Nowadays, THE IMMENSE of technology is having an SIMPLY increasing effect on INFLUENCE people's daily life. h However, there are some people who say argue that modern technology-based products do not cannot improve people's living standard. i In my opinion, this is a wrong statement.

First of all, there is no doubt that high-tech products help people to communicate with each other more easily. T hanks to the inventions of telephone, computer and especially the Internet, humans can keep in touch from a very long distance (NO VERB ). ALSO, they can give and receive share information through tv or radio programmes, which are considered as products of modern life.
akbarmappiare 31 / 469 275  
Dec 1, 2015   #4
Hi Tran Tri
You explained your reason why you disagree to that opinion, but I guess you should also write reason why many people argue that modern technology-based products do not improve people's living standard. If you explain it, readers will know that you have much knowledge about it. I believe you have many ideas which you can explore in your writing.

Overall, Good Job..
sinanju 2 / 2  
Dec 1, 2015   #5
hi linhtran
For the introduction, I myself have a suggestion:
Nowadays, modern technology is undoubtedly exerting effects on our daily life in variable aspects. However, there are opinion the modern technology-based products serve no purpose of increasing people's living standard. In my opinion, I suggest the statement is wrong for the following reasons.

Hopefully it would help


Home / Writing Feedback / Modern technology-based products do not improve people's lives
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳