Diagram process creates a black tea - a four-step process (IELTS TASK 1)

A four-step process of manufacturing black tea has illustrated in this diagram. As it can be seen, although in the third stage it differs on traditional and modern method, the initial and eventual processes are similar in both of tea types.

The production begins with selecting the best tea leaves in the plantation which is only bud and 2 top leaves. After picked up, the leaves are arranged on rack in order to release 60% of moisture from the leaves. This process called withering and use standing fan to blow the wind into the leaves. Once it moisture remaining 40%, the leaves is ready to be transformed into loose tea or tea bags. This is where the process diverges. To make loose tea, the leaves are manufactured with traditional method which is being rolled flat and broken with rolling machine. According the another process with modern method the leaves are cut, torn, and curled with cutting machine in order to generate tea bags. Before it ready to consume, both of tea types need to be fried or dried again in oven. The purpose of this treatment is not only to release flavor and aroma but also push out 97% moisture (in total) goes out from leaves.

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Bayu, when you write an overview of the report, try to figure out how you can lengthen the summary by presenting it in at least 3 sentences. You know that is the standard minimum length for any paragraph in an essay. In this case, you are short by one sentence so you need to expand it. The overview was so good that you forgot about that :-) Then there is the issue of the paragraphs as well. A minimum of 3 is also the ideal for any essay. You only have 2. I suggest that you divide the procedures into 2 groups so you can meet that requirement. Start a new paragraph when you discuss the second process. Now, on to the grammar portion. Here we go :-)

manufacturing black tea IS illustrated

As it can be seen, although in IT IS IMPORTANT TO NOTE THAT WHILE the third stage it differs FROM THE traditional and modern

production begins with SELECTION OF the best tea leaves in the plantation, COMPOSED OF A bud and 2 top leaves

After HARVESTING, the leaves are arranged on A rack in order

This process IS called withering and USES A standing fan to

blow the wind ONTO the

Once THE remaining MOISTURE IS DOWN TO 40%, the leaves ARE ready to be transformed

are manufactured IN THE traditional method WHICH IS DONE BY ROLLING THE LEAVES FLAT AND THEN BREAKING IT WITH A rolling

IN THE OTHER process, THE modern method , the leaves are cut, torn, and curled with A cutting machine

Before THE TEA IS ready to BE consumeD, both of tea types need to be fried or dried again in AN oven.

but also TO push out 97% OF moisture (in total) goes out from THE leaves.

Thank you @Vangiespen,
Still being busy thinking about grammar issue :-)

I try to re-write my introduction,

A four-step process of manufacturing black tea is illustrated in this diagram. It is important to note that while the third stage differs from the traditional and modern method, the initial and eventual processes are similar in both of tea types. Likewise, there are two kind of devices utilized to dehumidify the leaves.

Bayu, sorry about that. I am always inspired to help the students whom I see are really trying hard to improve. Most specially when I see constant improvement in the student's writing. You are one of those students :-) I won't tire of pointing out your areas of improvement so you can progress to the point where you can be sure that you will pass your IELTS test :-)

To continue, your new introduction is a definite improvement. There is just one portion that needs correcting. Sorry ;-)

processes are similar in both of tea types

Let me try to show you how you can better improve this introduction:

The four step black tea manufacturing process is illustrated in this diagram. While the modern and traditional method of processing the tea is similar, the third stage of processing differs for each processing type. That is why two kinds of devices need to be utilized when dehumidifying the leaves. A more complete explanation of the tea processing procedures follow below.

Do you see how the overview is more complete in this version? It offers a complete summary of the discussion and also provides a transition sentence at the end to introduce the next stage of discussion in the essay. That is normally how an introduction should be written :-) I hope my sample helps you.