well. i wrote an esay about the traffic jam : the reason and solution, Pls check error as well as the structre .thanks a lot ^^
Topic2 : traffic congestion is increasing. Write about the cause as well as the solution to it
In modern life we have to face with many problems one of which is traffic congestion becoming more serious day after day. It is said that the high volume of vehicles, the inadequate infrastructure and the irrational distribution of the develpoment are main reasons for increasing traffic jam
The major cause leading to traffic congestion is the high number of vehicle which was caused by the population and the development of economy. To solve this problem, the government should encourage people to use public transport or vehicles with small size such as bicycles or make tax on private vehicles. Particularly, in some Asia countries such as Viet Nam, the local authorities passed law restricting to the number of vehicles for each family.The methods mentioned above is indeed effective in fact.
That the inadequate infrastructure cannot handle the issue of traffic is also an crucial reason. The public transport such as bus, subway or train is not available and its quality is very bad, especially in the developing countries. Besides, the highway and road network is incapable of meeting the requirement of increasing number of vehicle. Coping with these difficulties, the government should make an investment in the traffic facilties, namely, the publc transport need improving to become more modern and convenient. In addition, it is useful to build overpasses and more lanes in the streets.
Apparently, the irrational distribution and the lack of conscience make the traffic worse and worse.The head offices, the univeristies or hospitals often locate in the centre of city attracting a heavy flow of people in rush hour. To handle this situation, the government should allocate suitably , for instance some unviersity or office will be moved to the outskirt of city. It is necessary to encourage poeple obey the traffic rules which will make greatly change the problem of traffic.
Finally, it's high time we were aware of the disadvatages as well as the solutions to the traffic congestion. With great effort from each individualist and government, our society will be definitely cleaner and well ï organized
In modern life we have to face with many problems [add in a comma] one of which is traffic congestion becoming more serious day after day.
The major cause leading to traffic congestion is the high number of vehicle which was caused by the population and the development of economy.
^ Consider revising
To solve this problem, the government should encourage people to use public transport or vehicles with small size such as bicycles or make tax on private vehicles
^ To solve this problem, the government should encourage people to use public transport or vehicles smaller in size, in order to prevent the roads from becoming packed too quickly. Likewise, owners of private vehicles should also be taxed.
"The public transport such as bus, subway or train is not available and its quality is very bad, especially in the developing countries."Thus is it unavailable, or just poor in quality?
"...our society will be definitely cleaner and well - organized"Why will our society be made cleaner when traffic congestion is alleviated? Consider revising the statement or adding in the cleanliness factor to your essay.
I suggest you to give some examples and make some comparisons, whereby making the solution stronger. Consider Hong Kong as a good example. Of course traffic there is busy and it has more desity of cars than much of the cities in the world, but there are few traffic jams. You can get some deeper refection via Hong Kong's secrets of success.
Strictly speaking, your first sentence is not needed. If you want an introductory sentence like that, make it short: Traffic congestion seems to increase every day. Go right to the point in your second sentence, rather than prefacing what you want to say with "it is said that."
In fact, always avoid "it is said that," and any reference whatsoever to "modern society," which is too vague to mean anything.
That said, I like the clarity with which you identify three causes of congestion and then go on to discuss each. That is the format that scorers are looking for in test essays.
Thinking about your solution -- more public transportation -- it occurs to me that this would be very good for the environment too. If congestion provokes investment in public transportation, then we could say that congestion was a good thing!
thanks a lot..but i wanna to ask ..which mark i will get for my essay..because i am preparing for Ielts...but i have trouble with writing..i donnot know exactly how to get high score :)
I'm sorry, but we cannot tell you what your score might be as we are not trained IELTS scorers. We can tell you what you need to do to improve your writing. Improving your writing will improve your score.
In general, you should be reading and writing in English as much as you can. Use the search feature on this site to read and see the feedback that has been given on other members' IELTS essays.
