Hi!
This essay is TOEFL writing essay type 1.
It is debate about autobiography.
It could be nice if you check my grammar mistakes and structure.
Thanks.
The passage and lecture is about autobiography. Autobiography is the book about famous people's success story. There has been controversial issue regarding autobiography. The passage has negative point of view of autobiography, whereas the professor has positive point of view of autobiography.
First of all, the passage argues negative factor of the autobiography which is focused on personal experience or emotional memory. Moreover, the autobiography is getting more and more commercialized to attract readers. According to the passage, book makers are focus on the factor which the readers want to be heard, so it makes worse quality of biography. However, the professor has totally different point of view about autobiography. She gainsays that the autobiography is very valuable itself. She thinks that, through the book, we can understand the world we never been, experience we never done before. She point out that the autography is window between ordinary people and famous people. Also, she suggests that, through the autograph, people can enrich their life as well.
Secondly, they have different view point of view about reality. The passage said that the autobiography should be real story, however, the pressure for making fantastic story made a lot of ghostwriter. However, the professor said that it does not matter whether the story is true or not. The professor emphasize that the more important thing is making readers impressive and affect their life.
According to the passage, book makers are focused on the factor which the readers want to be heard, so it makes worse quality of biography. ------------ this lacks clarity and hence confuses the reader about what you are trying to say
However, the professor has a totally different point of view about autobiography.
She thinks that, through the book, we can understand the world which we have never been, experienced we never done before.
