IELTS : The car has had greater effect on society than the airplane.

Agree or disagree? The car (automobile) has had greater effect on society than the airplane.

With the advances in technology, the automobile and fixed-wing airplane gradually became the major means of transportation. Many people argue that the civil aircraft has influenced profoundly our daily life. I believe that the widespread use of car, an important symbol of modernization in civilized societies, has more far-reaching effects.

Admittedly, the aircraft has brought benefits to citizens. Firstly, long-term travel time has been shortened because of the availability of the jet plane. Passengers, for instance, would be able to fly across the Pacific Ocean, without enduring the seasick for months. Moreover, the introduction of airplane opens up opportunities for multinational businesses. For example, businesspeople are able to visit factories based in different counties, coordinating production process properly. However, not all people prefer travelling by plane, as civil aviation normally require lots of money. It will cost passengers a fortunes to purchase airplane tickets, not to mention the high airport tax and fuel surcharge.

Compared with airplane, however, automobile has great advantages. To begin with, car is affordable for most people. The mass-production of the automobile offer individuals cars at a low price. Furthermore, the utilization of automobile is diversified. Cars can be effortlessly designed for multiple uses and this can be proved by such vehicles as sedan, bus, truck and construction car. Most importantly, the benefits of aircraft may be discounted during the unfavorable weather condition. Instead, many cars such as SUV can be driving under terrible condition, providing passengers with comfortable travel conditions, with no regard to the weather forecast.

In conclusion, although the development of aeroplane was a landmark in human history, the invention of the autocar has significantly reformed society since the availability of the steam engine automobile. Technically, most people prefer cars for its economical, multinational and comfortable.

....''more far- reaching'' .... more makes far redundant. So you've got to leave out one of those words.
This time your introduction is perfect ; )
I believe that the widespread use of car, an important symbol of modernization in civilized societies, has more influence on society.


- --------------- you are comparing the two modes, hence you should use the comparative form.
You write very well and this essay follows a good structure. You can surely go for a very good score.

Dear Dumi,

Terrific!

Thanks for your suggetion of the wording and using the comparative to compare two things, which make the essay much better.

I want to say your essay is really great in terms of structure and the choice of words... And your logic is good too.

Hai colin..

introduction good, this is what i told you.you can add you own style of vocabularies to make it different..

Keep it up...

Well done...

Tessy.