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IELTS:The best extra-curriculum activity, sports, community activities or traveling?


colin 23 / 48 15  
Dec 20, 2012   #1
Which extra-curriculum activity do you think is the best activity for students? Joining a sports team, b. participating in community activities, or traveling?

The extra-curriculum activity is a regular part of students' life, which can prevent teenagers from falling into criminal or undesirable activities such as teenage-sex or drug-taking. While I accept that students have profited from community activities or travelling, I believe that taking part in a sports team is the best way for students.

On the one hand, community activities and travelling have brought benefits to students. In community life, youngsters participate in a wide range of activities, ranging from the Christmas party to community services, which require students to communicate with neighbors and even organize activities. Thereby, youths obtain lots of opportunities to exercise interpersonal skills while playing and working. Furthermore, it has been proved that travelling can profoundly broaden adolescents' horizon. If a student have traveled to Japan, he or her can have a better understanding of what the Tokyo is like and how to communicate with Japanese, compared with simply studying in textbooks.

However, I would argue that a sport team would bring about more benefits to participators. Firstly, adolescents can improve their physical fitness in sport games. For example, basketball is a physical activities highly require flexibility, response capabilities and coordination of mind and body, all of which are important capabilities outside the sport stadiums. In addition, sport can exercise youths' willpower and endurance. We have seen that students with strong these personalities are more likely to success because they can never be impeded by temporary failures. Lastly, sports can greatly foster youngsters' team spirit which is very importantly beneficial for youths as long as they are in group, no matter in school or society,

In conclusion, it seems that joining in a sport team is the best activities outside class because it can enable students to increase fitness, exercise willpower and understand the importance of team spirit.
joythblessy 86 / 272 15  
Dec 21, 2012   #2
Hai Colin...

Nice to read your one more essay..

if a student have ===>if a student has

For example, basket ball...==>for ex. Basket ball is a physical activity which highly ....
===> for ex. physical activities like basket ball highly....

Tessy
joythblessy 86 / 272 15  
Dec 21, 2012   #3
if a student has....text books: ===>if a student has travelled to Japan he or she can get first hand experience about the culture, language and life style of Tokyo, compared with simply learning from text books.

If a student...he or her: ==>he or she

Broden adolescents' horizon ==> broden adolescents' horizon of knowledge and experience

Tessy

ce
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Dec 21, 2012   #4
The extra-curriculum activity is a regular part of students' life, which can prevent teenagers from falling into criminal or undesirable activities such as teenage-sex or drug-taking.

Here you can say they not only help student to stay away from undesirable activities but alson help them develop many valuable life skills such as team work, leadership skills etc. I guess you can leave out the part I highlighted.

While I accept that students have profited from community activities or travelling, I believe that taking part in a sports team is the best way for students.

Excellent! It had come very nicely! :)

Onthe one hand

Good job again :)
alphy 3 / 10  
Dec 21, 2012   #5
hai , good attempt


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