Traffic and housing problems in major cities would be solved by moving big companies, factories and their employees to the rural area. Do you agree or disagree?
With the booming development of some cosmopolitan metropolises in recent years, an increasing number of people are flooding into these major cities, raising such urban problems as traffic jams or housing shortage. In such cases, some people think an effective way to tackle these problems is to relocate big firms, factories and their employees in cities to the countryside. However, from my perspective, I suppose this suggestion is not advisable, for it cannot alter the situation essentially and instead it may give rise to new concerns in rural areas.
Admittedly, moving big companies, factories and their employees to the rural area can help ease traffic congestion and housing scarcity. As people work in the countryside, they will not have to commute in cities at peak times such as eight o'clock in the morning or six o'clock in the afternoon. Consequently, urban traffic jam can be, to some extent, relieved in this respect. On the other hand, the relocation of companies and factories in cities may leave more space to build new residential areas, thus alleviating the urban housing crisis at present.
However, the proposed measure is not fundamental to resolve urban traffic and housing problems. This is because some employees are reluctant to live in the rural areas only due to the relocation of their workplaces. This can be best illustrated with the example of the married workers. Taking into the growth of their children into consideration, the married workers may believe the educational resources in cities are far superior to ones in the countryside, and because of this, they probably opt for living in the cities. Thus, these employers have to commute between the cities and the countryside, which is ineffective in tackling traffic and housing problems. What is worse, the workers have to consume more time and traffic fees.
Also, the suggested step can bring about environmental problems in the rural areas. As companies and factories move to the countryside, they may deplete the local natural resources as the raw materials for production. Besides, the untreated pollutants the plants discharge can be damaging to the rural environment .Therefore, moving companies, factories and employees to the rural areas can ruin the environment there.
Overall, I would conclude that relocating big firms, factories and their employees is not sensible to address urban traffic and housing problems. Instead, the government should be forward-looking, resolving the problems within the cities.
Well, your essay is great.
If you could summarize the top sentence in each main body, personally, it will make your outline clearer~~
your grammar and vocabulary are so impressive. There are many phrases and new words useful to me.
However, i think the structure should be fixed
In the first paragraph, you have mentioned some urban problems such as urban housing crisis and traffic congestion. This is good. However, it is more important to include the specific reasons why you disapprove, of which your writing lacks. Let's see you only say "for it cannot alter the situation essentially and instead it may give rise to new concerns in rural areas"
This is unclear.
Moreover, i think your second paragraph is not very suitable. You should focus on your reasons . Just briefly talk about the advantages in the introductory or conclusion paragraphs.
One small thing, the conclusion should not be so short D:
I think if you can fix this mistakes, your essay will be nearly perfect :)
