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Required attendance in college or university classes.


babyevy 3 / 27  
May 27, 2010   #1
WITE AN OPINION ESSAY ABOUT REQUIRED ATTENDANCE IN COLLEGES OR UNIVERSITIES CLASSES

One of the most common areas where classroom practices of colleges or universities differ is attendance policy. Some universities require their students to attend all classes, while others leave it as an option. In my opinion, attendance should be optional because it encourages students' responsibility, gives them more flexibility and contributes with the learning process.

The first reason for this is that optional attendance encourages students to be more responsible. Research indicates that at the ages of 18-21, personality and brain development has already reached a stage of maturity. Consequently, students can make rational decisions about prioritizing what's most important in their lives, and learn that there are consequences to their choices. It is said that, "If you treat people like children, they may act like children." Furthermore, Universities are supposed to be the educational institutions that prepare students for real life. For instance, if you were responsible enough at university to make good decisions, you will most probably be responsible at work.

The second reason is that it gives students flexibility. Sometimes students cannot express their abilities and skills in other University Activities because they have to attend classes, and they miss important events in activities such as Sport, drama, etc. For example, a talented basketball player cannot participate in the final game of an important tournament because he is compelled to attend a class; he would have missed a great opportunity in his sport career; hence, it would not be beneficial for both students and universities. Besides, 75% of students have other obligations. Each student is a person who has a totally different history with different experiences in life and different issues to deal with. For instance, students that have to work long hours to pay their studies are sometimes unable to attend classes, or parents who have to take care of the family, work and also study, may miss classes for reasons that are beyond their control.

Finally, it gives meaningful contribution to the learning process. Students can concentrate more. Evidence shows that learning is more productive with more concentration. If a student had an important business but was forced to go to a class he would be thinking about that all the class and will not pay attention. Moreover, students do not benefit from forced attendance. Forced students do not give a significant contribution to a class; on the other hand, they may cause disruption in the classroom by distracting other students or sending text messages with their cell phones. Students easily focus on what the teacher is explaining when the classroom is quiet and everyone is willing to learn.

On the whole, Universities should make attendance optional so that students can learn to be more responsible, have a more flexible schedule and also learn better. I strongly believe that students who are really interested in studying will definitely attend classes without being forced.

THIS IS AN ESSAY I WROTE LAST MONTH BUT MY TEACHER JUST CORRECTED THE GRAMMAR MISTAKES ASKED ME TO RE DO IT BUT DIDN'T GIVE ME SOME HELPFUL FEEDBACK. CAN YOU HELP ME OUT WITH YOUR COMMENTS AND SUGGESTION PLEASE!!! :)

JUST IN CASE IF MY TEACHER IS IN THIS FORUM I AM SORRY! BUT IT IS THE TRUE.
Mustafa1991 8 / 373 4  
May 29, 2010   #2
I just glanced at the topic sentences, and I think they are really weak. You can blend those points easily and have a well thought out opinion. You should not create artificial points that are not absolutely required; it undermined your credibility
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
May 30, 2010   #3
the topic sentences, and I think they are really weak.

It is interesting... when someone uses a list of 3 things in the thesis and then has topic sentences that correspond to the three things, the topic sentences are often boring. So, like Mustafa says, it is good to add some interesting detail to the topic sentences. The topic sentence, as you know, is the sentence that begins a paragraph and tells its main idea.

Make the topic sentences more powerful by changing them so that they strongly support your main argument: As you write a topic sentence, imagine that you are not going to be allowed to write any more sentences and that you must make me understand your point in a single sentence, like this...

The first reason for this is that optional attendance encourages students to be more responsible by giving them the freedom to make good or bad decisions .

You write very well!!! I'm adding this to my collection of "example essays" with good structure:
OP babyevy 3 / 27  
May 31, 2010   #4
You should not create artificial points that are not absolutely required; it undermined your credibility

THANKS Mustafa, you are right my topic sentences are weak, kevin has helped me to get your idea, but about not creating artificial points, I did it just because our teacher allowed us to do it to support our points. He said " to develop your supporting details you can use quotations and statistics, if you don't know invent..." I suppose that it is because he just want us to learn how to write properly... ;)
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jun 1, 2010   #5
Yeah, this helped me gt a new insight, too. Essays with good structure that depends on a list in the thesis statement and topic sentences that correspond to the list items may have boring topic sentences if you don't make an effort to make those topic sentences interesting in some way. Add some strange or unexpected details to those topic sentences.. :-)
LehFoxeh 1 / 2  
Jun 12, 2010   #6
I reccomend you change up the transitions between paragraphs.
"First ...
Second ...
Finally ..."
Is so .. boring.

Also, as mustafa said, I think you can blend the points together more, and have a stronger argument. As of now they sort of.. float off in seperate directions, and that takes away from your point.


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