Hey there... I see all your writing presented consists of a five paragraph essay. And to tell you the truth, this is not too good because the improvement on vocabulary sentence structure, tone, etc. as to build coherence and cohesion is closely loosed . Although many sample writings for the five ones coming from some corners of the world are confidently shown, this seems more likely to make
beginner students hard to polish their sentence structure. Focus on the time given, not the lengthy report.
Have this link if you really really really need to earn a good score:
To sum up, some people was more interested watching television than radio at 18.00 o'clock - 21.00 o'clock that undergone to fall sharply at the time.
An overview, not conclusion. Have this link if you really really really need to earn a good score: ielts-simon.com/ielts-help-and-english-pr/2014/03/ielts-writing-t ask-1-overview-not-conclusion