Hello! Please grade my essay below from point 1 to 6. (A 6 would be a well-organized, clear, coherent, strong essay with varied sentence structures and good vocabulary, whereas a 1 would be a very flawed, poorly organized, incoherent essay with many errors in grammar and diction.) Any feedback is also welcomed. Thank you for taking the time to read!
Is conflict helpful?
In the pages of human history, conflicts are unavoidable. From the Civil War to everyday conflicts of ordinary people, we can see conflicts everywhere. Although people usually consider conflicts as harmful and disastrous, conflicts can actually have a helpful side that enables us to learn and improve ourselves. This can be seen in the examples of Elizabeth Bennet, the protagonist of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice; and of the American Civil War, which happened in the 1800's because a strong conflict between the slavery proponents and abolitionists.
Conflicts can help us to learn better about ourselves. In the novel written by Jane Austen, Elizabeth Bennet is a beautiful, clever, genial but stubborn girl. She often quickly judges people on the first impression, and can hardly change her judgements. Darcy is one of such people who did not give a good first impression on Elizabeth, and therefore is considered by Elizabeth as an arrogant, ill-tempered, and evil man. However, later, Elizabeth has a conflict with Darcy, and through solving this conflict, Elizabeth discovers that Darcy is in fact a good-natured, benevolent and honest man, who only aren't very good at talking with strangers. She also realizes that she is too judgemental and obstinate. Elizabeth's story is a good example of how conflicts can help people to learn better about themselves, and even others around them.
But the helpfulness of conflicts does not limit to that. Conflicts can have a more benefitting and significant impact on the whole society and generations. The American Civil War is a good example. A strong conflict between the slavery supporters and the slavery opposters provoked this war. Because a compromise could not be reached, the supporters and opposters inevitably started the Civil War to fight for their own beliefs. Although the war is definitely unpleasant, it eventually freed the black slaves in America, and helped the country to be a true democratic nation where every human is equal and respected. The Civil War not only gave freedom to millions black people, it also inspired many other people to start their struggles for freedom and equal rights, such as women, minorities and people in the developing countries. The Civil War is also a perfect example to demonstrate the good effect of conflicts.
Through the examples of Pride and Prejudice and the Civil War, we can clearly see that conflicts, although being traditionally considered as harmful, is actually helpful in many ways. "Every coin has two sides." said the philosopher Emerson. So do conflicts. We should now realize that there may be something more to learn than to simply solve a conflict and pray to avoid it.
TO Moderator, I mistakenly posted this under the Undergraduate Admission section. Sorry. I've deleted the original post and repost it here.