The issue whether the mass media, including television, radio and newspapers affects
people's thinking is under discussion. Some people believe that they have a considerable effect on people while others claim that the opposite is true. I am convinced by the former view for following reasons. (What is the former view? and state your reasons)
The first reason for my support is that (This sounds like the elementary level way of writing. I prefer you just delete those words, and leave the rest of the sentence as is.) T
he mass media is to expand our understanding about environment. There
is (I believe "are" before "a" is gramatically incorrect, and it sounds wrong when read)
a huge number of environmental programs on television every week which provides numerous viewers with explanation of the
and how important it is. Provide an example of a show or program, and talk about it.
Without these programs, citizens may hardly
comprehend the reasons
have to protect the air, water and land on the Earth. Besides, not only does the mass media enhance our perception of the world, but it also gives us simple ways to save our home, classifying rubbish, not buying products doing harm to environment, etc. (I don't like this sentence. Very confusing. You might want to add that other movies and shows are also educational to personal lives and experiences . . . somewhere along those lines and explain with examples if you can.)
Another argument is that television, radio and newspapers intensify our knowledge about social issues and have significant influence on our attitude towards these problems. Every day there are several
broadcasted and analyzed on television and radio. Most of us contend whether a social event is good or not, which depends substantially on what experts analyze in the media. Moreover, regardless of what the truth is, whether good news outweigh bad news affects considerably our point of view about the situation occurring. (I got lost reading this. I could not comprehend what you were trying to say. Try to make it a little more simple)
For example, when financial crisis happens, almost only bad news is reported by the mass media while
which causing people to be more pessimistic
In short, the mass media, including television, radio and newspapers, (the comma is not needed)
has a big impact on our thoughts
, cultivating our knowledge about the world, life,
social issues and orienting our attitude towards them.
You need to proofread and be more detailed. Hope it helps.