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"What famous place would you you like to visit?" - TOEFL ibt writing



mywillThreads: 4
Posts: 15
Author: Hieu Nguyen
   
May 17, 2011, 09:40am   #1
What famous place would you you like to visit ? Use details and reasons to support your response.

When I was a kid, I dreamed of having chance to visit France, which is the center of fashion. The most fascinating thing of France is scenic and ancient, and there are also plenty of structures as well as buildings which were constructed long time ago. But what strikes me does not stop at that concept. Another striking part of France is...
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Thanks for all advice.
your faithfully,
Hugh



dumiThreads: 1
Posts: 7,259
Author: Duminda
[Moderator] Likes 1402  
May 18, 2011, 03:56am   #2
When I was a kid, I dreamed of having a chance to visit France, which is the center of fashion. The most fascinating thing of about France is that it is both scenic picturesque and ancient historically important. ,[/s] and tThere are also plenty of structures as well as buildings which were constructed long time ago. But what strikes me does not stop at that concept. Another striking part of France is Paris, the capital of France, is one of the world's most striking a cityies of for fashion and style. My sister works as the officer-in-charge of designers for a fashion company. wWhen young, I possessed a basic understanding of fashion as my sister told me a lot of interesting things about Paris along with her career. From that time, she raised influenced the passion of for designing in my mind., tThat is why I am into creating new models of clothes designs and wishes looking forward to visiting my dreamland one day.


mywillThreads: 4
Posts: 15
Author: Hieu Nguyen
   
May 18, 2011, 05:47am   #3
thanks Dumi. I should really brsuh up on more


EF_KevinThreads: 33
Posts: 14,154
Author: You can help a lot of people by visiting the "Unanswered" threads!
 Likes 4  
May 19, 2011, 01:27pm   #4
Hieu, the next thing to do is type the essay in the post below, and use the corrections dumi provided.
If you have time to type it below, I'll look to see if you still have any errors. Do that, and you'll improve your skill! :-)


mywillThreads: 4
Posts: 15
Author: Hieu Nguyen
   
May 19, 2011, 08:29pm   #5
When I was a kid, I dreamed of having a chance to visit France, which is the center of fashion. The most fascinating thing about France is that it is both picturesque and historically important. There are also plenty of structures as well as buildings which were constructed long time ago. But what strikes me does not stop at that. Paris, the capital of France, is one of the world's most striking cities for fashion and style. My sister works as the officer-in-charge-of designers for a fashion company. When young, I possessed a basic understanding of fashion as my sister told me a lot of interesting things about Paris along with her career. From that time, she influenced the passion of designing in my mind. That is why I am into creating new designs and look forward to visiting my dreamland one day.


heena33Threads: 5
Posts: 28
Author: heena harshita
   
May 20, 2011, 02:20am   #6
ya may error try to improve
BEST OF LUCK!!
:-)




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