Some people are of the view that home is the first learninginstituteinstitution for every individual
The parents as well as other family members teach child to behave in appropriate manner in order to be regarded as a good member of society
WhileHowever, others hold that school is the place that is responsible for teaching children to be socially responsible.
... You need to incorporate this line in the previous paras.
"While" is a connector so you need to have another idea here if you use "while".
In my opinion, both the school as well as parents play undistinguished and crucial role in the development of children.
... this too should come in this introduction
Your introduction should include an introduction to the topic and your opinion.
Try the 4 para structure; Introduction (topic + opinion), 2 Body paras ( reason for your opinion + specific example), Conclusion