"By age 24, 60% of bullies have a criminal record." Also, do you know that 92% of statistics are made up? If you are going to make claims like this, you need to cite your sources. Also, you might want to define "bullying" at some point. "Verbal and physical assault" seems to be your closest definition, but if every act of verbally insulting another counts as bullying, I doubt there is a kid in the world who could not be classified as a bully. You might want to add something about lack of provocation, how sustained the behavior is, etc. Also, is the essay going to focus specifically on how to stop bullying? If so, your introduction seems generally solid. If you are giving more of a general overview of the subject, you might want to focus a bit more on what causes bullying. In fact, if you believe that understanding the causes of something is necessary to stopping that thing, you might want to delve into that anyway.