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The Advantages of Capital Punishment-- very short essay --



silentheart     Jun 12, 2009, 04:44pm   #1
The Advantages of Capital Punishment
There are some important advantages of capital punishment, and why the capital punishment is a good way to punish the people, and the advantages of capital punishment.
Capital punishment is an important way to punish the criminals, who killed people or who slaughters people because they killed people, so depend on their criminals, they deserve the capital punishment. For example, the Ahmadzadi, who is someone, works with the government, "of course I support the punishment of these criminals before an ecstatic crowd of people, so everyone knows penalty that may be set them in the event the commission of such crimes, and thus avoid.
Capital punishment doesn't prevent the criminal operations, but the capital punishment reduces the criminal operations and violent crimes from the house to the street and everyplace because capital punishment makes the people afraid of kill people. For instance, Farouk Al-Hussein, who is a spokesman for the religious to the municipalities that the implementation of public executions, "it's to broadcast fear in the hearts of criminals, and the criminals who is planning to commit crimes, to reducing crime rates."
Capital punishment is an important way to punish the criminals because the benefit from the application if the death penalty as it governs when a person sentenced for example, a period of twenty years and then when he out of prison maybe he will try to kill again. Also, capital punishment is an important punishes which helps the government in order to reduce the number of detainees in prison during the execution.
In short, the advantage of capital punishment is a good way to punish who kill or slaughter or who rape people.


please i want from someone to correct the grammar and the Organization, and to add some sentence..
EF_SimoneThreads: 3
Posts: 2,101
Author: Simone, EssayForum.com [Moderator]    		Jun 12, 2009, 09:51pm   #2
I can give you some feedback to help you improve the essay yourself. The first thing you must do is establish basic competence in English while stating your thesis. As it stands, the essay begins with two extremely long run on sentences:

There are some important advantages of capital punishment, and why the capital punishment is a good way to punish the people, and the advantages of capital punishment.
Capital punishment is an important way to punish the criminals, who killed people or who slaughters people because they killed people, so depend on their criminals, they deserve the capital punishment.


I think that the first sentence could end where you have the first comma. The second sentence becomes incoherent by the clause "so depend on their criminals." Since I can't figure out what you are saying, I can't suggest how to rephrase it. Start again, using very short, simple sentences.
silentheart     Jun 13, 2009, 04:34am   #3
can you make correction on it please........
EF_SimoneThreads: 3
Posts: 2,101
Author: Simone, EssayForum.com [Moderator]    		Jun 13, 2009, 09:38am   #4
Again, I suggest that you begin again. Start with a clear statement of your thesis. Do not write strings of clauses connected by commas. Look at the two sentences I selected. I have already told you how to fix the first one. Make that correction. For the second sentence, I cannot make corrections, because your meaning is unclear to me. I do know that it should be broken into several short sentences. Do that, and post the result here. Once we have gotten your introduction straightened out, we can think about the rest of the essay.
EF_SeanThreads: 6
Posts: 3,676
Author: Sean, EssayForum.com [Moderator]    		Jun 13, 2009, 06:50pm   #5
For the organization, start by defining capital punishment. The U.S. implementation of the death penalty, for instance, is very different from, say, China's implementation of it. What sort of system of capital punishment are you talking about? What are its key features? This is especially important because you are arguing in favor of capital punishment. If you were arguing against it, you might be able to get away with making a moral case against ever killing convicted criminals, but if you are arguing for it, you need to specify what sort of system you support.

If you are going to argue that capital punishment is a deterrent, you will need to look at how crime rates vary among nations with and without the death penalty, and see what correlations you can find.

You should probably play up the notion that capital punishment does wonders for the recidivism rate, too. You sort of mention this near the end of your essay, but it is one of the strongest arguments in favor of the death penalty, and deserves a more in-depth treatment.
silentheart     Jun 16, 2009, 01:34am   #6
thank you.......


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