Hi Nicky.
You have expressed good ideas in your essay, however you have many mistakes in grammar, sentence structure, and spelling.
I will try to mention some of them.
My
my by lowercase "m"
She always assigned a lot of homework and teach extra classes in weekend, at the end of that semester, we all got significant prograss in English though we were exhausted.
1. thaught (you have to keep the parallelism of verb tenses in a sentence)
2. at weekend (you can even say on weekend but never in weekend)
that decide the result
decide does not suit here. You can use
determine instead.
From this so long time you studied this year, we could possibly see your hard-work, but from the high efficiency, we can definitely see your intelligent.
You have better to rewrite this sentence. Its structure is wrong and it sounds poorly and it is not clear what you want to say here.
a computer tools
do not use article
a with plural. Also I believe Matlab is a tool not tools.
which can calculate almost all math questiones efficiently.
which is designed to solve almost all math problems efficiently.
Once a time
just
oncetwo same tasks to me and my friend
the same task to me and ...
caused by my careless
carelessness
right result
correct result
three days ago.
after three days will sound better
From this example, we can conclude that efficiency amounts far more than completing it quickly, it also means bo it rightly
Needs to be rewritten For example like this
"From this example we can conclude that efficiency is not just completing tasks quickly but what is more important solving it correctly".In addition, perhaps most importantly, the sense of we students' holiday is not rooted not only in just playing games and computers, but rather provide us a relaxed time to relax ourselves and some thing interesting, with purpose of efficiently study in next semester.
Needs to be rewritten.
"In addition, for students holiday does not only mean to have a time for games, but rather to have time for rest, when they can involve in some interesting activities, not related to school and studies. This will help them to return to the school refreshed and be ready for another efficient study semester."things as we like
we like without
aslearned how to swimming
how to swim or just swimming
I suggest you to go through comments I've written, then you can rewrite your whole essay and post back :)
Good luck