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IELTS - mobile phones and youngstars-a necessary evil


heena33 4 / 18  
May 16, 2011   #1
HI!! frends hope u like it

Mobile phones have become a need for each a every human . Mobile phones before were used a talking device but nowadays they are used for messaging , chating , and everything else that we have'nt thought of . With no. of facility added to the mobile the demand for the mobile increases day by day. Mobile has been popuralised among the youngstars.

In todays date not only youngstars but also teenager prefar this.It has become a part of new trend of fashion. children demand for new sets or new model of mobile phones . A child make him/herselp busy in playing game , sending SMS , chating seeing nusance etc and parents don't at all pay a little attention towards it and hence the child waste time and lose his/her parts of studies. And so it happens in youngstar they too do the same. Nowadays Parents too encourage them ,by saying to get a mobile phone or some sort of gagets if they keep good marks or achive in something .But before parents use to gif a pen or a watch or a book .So,we can say parents are too responsible for there lose in studies

so as a result it is an evil dead not only for the student but also for the youngstars

*kindly ignor if some mistake are present as it is my first essay and do appreciate to write more in order to encourage me
THANK YOU....your heena33
irs055 4 / 8  
May 18, 2011   #2
you should include how it effect on the social aspects of life..

Illicit relations.
videos and others getting leaked...
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
May 19, 2011   #3
why did u cut that line ??

Oh, sorry I forgot to explain! I cut it because it confused me. I hate things that confuse me! :-) ha ha...

Hence, the child wastes time and loses interest in her studies. And so it happens that youngsters also do the same. Nowadays parents encourage them...

Above, I fixed the grammar and spelling, but it does not make sense, because you said a child wastes time and a youngster does the same, but... the child and the youngster are both the same person. So... that sentence is unnecessary.

Do you know what I mean?

:-)
mywill 4 / 10  
May 19, 2011   #4
- The best way you can strike the scores of IELTS writing is that you had better try to write a balanced essay rather than a one-sided essay.

- You should contrast the two faces of a problem mentioned in the topic. I think u can do it well but be careful!
- You should go too far from the topic, I mean, you should not write too much when your concepts or ideas are shortened. A short but adequate will bring you a better result as well as you ensure the content of the topics.

- Any essay in TOEFL ibt or IELTS would have an ending. Try to sum up everything you write. That is why you can make your stuff more logically

Nice to meet all


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