Some people think that we learn our most important lessons in school. Others think that the knowledge we acquire outside of school is the most important. Which view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Nowadays, there are two opinions concerning the importance of school. While some hold that our most important lessons are learned from school, others reckon that people gain most useful knowledge outside of school. In my opinion, although school plays an important role in people's acquirement of knowledge, people acquire the most important knowledge from their social experiences because social experiences can help us to apply knowledge learned from school to practical experience, to obtain practical ability and to learn from many people.
To start with, even though life in school offers most people the first chance to know about social life because we start to learn how to be with people outside of family, we need to employ these communication skills to act more politically in the society. For instance, we may get into some trouble in school so we need to explain the situation to the person who is in charge, and during the process to solve it, we develop our communication ability. Yet, when we get into the society, situation will be more complex; for example, the boss will be much stricter than the professor. Thus, not only do we need to apply the ability we acquire from school, but we also need to improve it.
Furthermore, the practical ability is most significant for us, although without knowledge from school we can not read, neither can we understand literal and art works, neither can we understand well educated people's talk.The reason is that no matter what we learn, we just want to be more competitive when we get into the society to hunt for a job, and when we are hunting for jobs, the employers focuse on our ability to come up with fresh ideas, to carry out plans and to solve problems. However, to a great degree, the abilities above are developed in the process of social practices. For instance, nearly everyone having graduated from advertisement major knows how to design an advertisement, while people who can grasp quickly what the manufactures want to express and can make the advertisement attracting to the customers will be more competitive.
Lastly, we can learn from people outside of school. Parents teach us to be patient; salesmen we meet in public occasions teach us how to introduce commodity to people; servants in hospital, restaurants, resorts, and so on teach us how to know what customers need sensibly. All these above are very important for us to have big personal success in the future.
According to what I have mentioned above, people learn most important lessons not from school but from places out of it.
Nowadays, there are two opinions concernedconcerning the importance of school. [ Some hold that our most important lessons are learned from school. Meanwhile, some reckon that people gain most useful knowledge outside of school.] (combine these two sentences) In my opinion, school is playingplays one of the most important roles in people's acquirement of knowledge. Parents want children to have good education is pretty reasonable. However, people acquire most important knowledge, not from school, but from their social experience. (Your thesis could use a little clarity - at first it seems you are of the opinion that school is the most important place to gain knowledge, but then your last sentence contradicts it. Maybe something along the lines of, "Although school plays an important role in people's acquirement of knowledge, I believe people acquire the most important knowledge from their social experiences.")
I think you have the general idea of your essay down, and you do bring up good points, however focus more on the importance of knowledge outside of school and expand on it. Although school teaches us basic communication skills, i agree that these mean nothing if you don't learn how to act politely from your surroundings (knowledge gained outside of school). Your second paragraph which promotes the importance of school somewhat counters your thesis. I feel like you are writing more of a comparison essay by arguing both sides of the issue rather than just arguing for one. Lastly, for variety's sake, try to vary your sentence length. Don't be afraid to make longer sentences. All in all, your essay is off to a nice start :)
