Please help to review my essay below. Thank you so much...
Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, international tourism creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
It has been known for some time that the international tourism industry is playing more and more important role in every single country's as well as the world's economy. Some people argue that it brings more troubles than helps such as tension rather than understanding between tourists and local people. In my point of view, I tend to disagree with this opinion.
On one hand, international tourism is undoubtedly good. First of all, it helps people to relax and get away from their world of work. By seeing natural landscape beauties, lying on beautiful sunny beaches or taking part in exciting wilderness adventures in remote countries, people can easily recharge and go back to their daily life with full of energy. Another second point is that while heavy industries are contributing majority of many countries' GDP, tourism is doing no less. However, tourism is totally a green industry with minimum initial investment and doing almost no harm to environment. Therefore, promoting international tourism is not only important but vital mission of every government.
On the other hand, being a tourist in foreign countries may bring with it problems that can lead to dislike of local people. There are plenty of reasons for this such as misunderstandings between locals and foreigners due to language barrier, tourist are often hassled to buy goods or being cheated. Yet, these situations can be improved with interventions and better management of local authorities. In contrast, native people may also end up disliking foreigners. Visitors may mistakenly act contrary or show their disrespectful behaviors to local norms. However, by reading and studying about the local cultures and customs of a country or city before coming, these unexpected tourists' behaviors can be eliminated without any difficulty.
In conclusion, my view is governments should do every effort to promote international tourism, have more practical interventions to keep security for tourist areas, and foreigners should actively study local cultures before traveling. By doing so, there will be no tensions but delight and benefits for both tourists and locals.
First of all, it helps people to relax and get away from the stress of their world of work.
By seeingenjoying the beauty of natural landscapesbeauties , lying on beautiful sunny beaches or taking part in exciting wilderness adventures in remote countries, people can easily recharge themselves and go backreturn to their daily life with full of energy.
In your first para you highlight two reasons to support your argument. However, you dont provide specific examples for both. My recomendation is to give one reason in each body para and provide a solid specific example to support that reason. :)
Noted, thank you Dumi :)
First of all, it helps people to relax and get away from their world of work. ==>First of all, it enables people to run away from the hustle and bustle of the work.
I think it's better..
On one hand, international tourism is undoubtedly good. First of all, it helps people to relax and get away from (As mentioned from Dumi you must add something referring to stress of tiredness) their world of work. By seeingspending wonderful time in the beauty of the nature , lying on beautiful sunny beaches or taking part in exciting wilderness adventures in remote countries, people can easily recharge and go back to their daily life with full of energy. Another second point is that while heavy industries are contributing majority of many countries' GDP, tourism is doing no less. However, tourism is totally a green industry with minimum initial investment and doing almost no harm to environment. Therefore, promoting international tourism is not only important but vital mission of every government.
You should give an example for at least one of paragraph and it is better to give that example to the opinion you supported.
Thank you Hadi, any more comments pls...
