Unanswered [31] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


' the happiness we experience' - we experience special days in our life easier


neo1989 8 / 15  
Aug 11, 2012   #1
people may come up with different ideas about this subject but i have my own reasons which are : being a rare occasion make it easy to be remembered, and because we are very happy when we receive our gifts. Human life is consisted of many stages and steps including, infancy, childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, adulthood and old age and during this long period of time we experience many things such as birthday, marriage, entering university, graduating and so on. there are number of rare occasions that we remember them easier than the rest. One of them are when receive a gift from a friend or a relative. [..]
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Apr 11, 2015   #2
Hey Neo,

Kindly find my help below;

people(PEOPLE) may come up with different ideas about this subject but i have my own reasons which are (: - DELETE AND REPLACE WITH ",") being a rare occasion make it easy to be remembered(, - DELETE PUNCTUATION MARK) and because we are very happy when we receive our gifts. Human life (is consisted - DELETE - CONSIST) of many stages and steps including(, - DELETE PUNCTUATION MARK) infancy, childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, adulthood and old age and during this long period of time we experience many things such as birthday, marriage, entering university, graduating and so on. there(THERE) are (number of - DELETE, CONTRADICTING, WHEN YOU SAY "RARE OCCASION" THERES NOT A LOT OF THEM BECAUSE THEY'RE RARE) rare occasions that we remember them easier than the rest. One of them are when (WE) receive a gift from a friend or a relative.

First of all, i think the number of the times that we receive gifts from other are not many and this helps us to remember them easier than the rest. for(For) example although i(I) have good memory for names and good photographic memory i(I) fail to remember how many time(TIMES) i(I) actually took test at university. on contrary i know the exact number of birthday parties that i have thrown so far which is fifteen and i can remember each and every one of them clearly. Also in my country people celebrate few days in year and in some of those parties adults give teenagers and small children money and some times (SOMETIMES) gift that i also can remember all of those events and what kind of toy i received and from who i received that toy. for example five years ago i received a helicopter toy from my grandmother and she gave it to me when she got back from travel. i like this toy a lot and it is still on my desk. despite the fact that this (reason cannot be - DELETE AND ADD "is not") the only reason for remembering events easier but it can help.

second (of all - DELETE), because of the feeling we have when we receive gifts from other help us remember thing easier than the rest. nobody could deny that we are very happy when we received gift from our beloved friend and from our relatives such as our parents or our uncle. the kind of pleasure and happy moments that we experience during the party make it a special occasion that we can never forget. Also because we picture those happy moments and beautiful scenes many times after that day in our mind it helps our mind remember them better in the following years.

in conclusion there are two important factors that make remembering special days easier, special days as their name implies are unique and because of the happiness we experience in those special days.

Neo, please take note that when starting a sentence, the first word should be capitalize, the usage of "I" in a sentence should also be capital, be mindful of your grammar, punctuation marks, little details that makes a lot of difference and finally, PROOF READ it before sending it out to your readers.

Cheers!!!


Home / Writing Feedback / ' the happiness we experience' - we experience special days in our life easier
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳