IELTS; governments should give financial support to creative artists

Some people think that governments should give financial support to creative artists such as painters and musicians. Others believe that creative artists should be funded by alternative sources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Arts enrich our lives and society. Artists create their own thought that has a significant impact on the way of life. Their creativity is appreciated and helpful for the nations. But people have different view that whether authority supports their fundings or they will go for alternative sources. I believe both government and other sources should be funded.

Governments do need to look at creative artists. Because any genuine artist aims to make some arts better for his native land. In art project a huge money needs to create, financial support is vital for them otherwise, it is impossible for them to build a new project. They require government's assistance and help. There are many works in public the place for example, in my country, sculptures and statues are erected in the centre of cross-roads. These symbolize our liberation war. So it is easy for us to practice our cultural activities. They serve to protect our culture and heritage and we are proud about them.

In addition, people express their view that financial assistance should be generated by alternative sources. The reason is likely to be that the governments spend money on public services such as general treatment, education and fabrics. These public facilities are fundamental for a country to function properly. Provision to creative artist is a waste of money. Another reason is, some artists create arts as a passion and profession. Their arts are neither rich nor famous but they continue to produce arts as a passion.

Finally, arts affect everywhere of our natural movement however, I believe apart from the flipside government funding is to be ensured to create arts.

this is too long to grab a reader's attention..merge this three sentences to make it catchy.


This sentence convey a different meaning than what you are trying to say.


your main ideas should be the phrase highlighted in blue or the other highlighted in green.these are the aspects you should talk about for this paragraph.

summary:
change your intro paragraph:talk about artists, the theory about financing them and your opinion.
1st idea:how the society will benefit if govt is funding artists
2nd idea:why should artists source out other establishments for their fundings, mention samples of financial sources too
conc:relate both ideas to your opinion

hope this helps...

Nice intro...


here third line will make a good start of the para then the first line.
some better arts
money is required/needed


Quite confusing..

Good feedback from gmad06 as always.
@gmad06 - I wish you become a contributor to this forum. In fact I'm inviting you to be one and help others writing. If you are interested, please tell me :)


@fahadbd - You need to align your writing more with the prompt. Your focus here should be on discussing whether it is the government or other sources who should fund creative artists. Very little is written to address that.