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"Enjoyment" - The College Years are the Best Time in a Person's Life.


bahareh 18 / 50  
Sep 21, 2011   #1
"Enjoyment" is the only thing that I remembered from those College time. I had a plenty of time to get to know my new friends in College, and have a good plan for my future job. There was no responsibility to take care of family or other issues which might be related to me, so I felt like I can enjoy and use this opportunity to take more advantages through the studying time. College years are the best time to know other people, plan for future job, and find enjoyment.

First but foremost, the best time to connect to others and get to know each other is the study time in College. There are many new people who came from different places in the world with various culture and costume which leads to make a useful connection for student' future. Students can learn many knowledge and experience from their foreign friends which's not been discussed before. For instance, I remembered my best friend Sara who was Japanese, taught me how to get more concentration during the study time. Believed it or not, that was the best strategy that I have ever learned to aid more successful.

Beside, through College time, everybody can be prepared for his or her future job. It is easy to find an advisor in one of the College' offices, who helps students to find out about their favorite subject to continue and get ready to reach a good qualification for that. For example, all teachers in Ontario in Canada have to pass one year College teacher to be qualified as a teacher in this province. And this experience helps them to find the better view of teaching through their internship work in school which is provided by College.

In addition, there is the most enjoying time that has ever been experienced by everybody through his or her College life. That is the only time with no responsibility for any matters; thus, learners try their time to go out or party with their friends and enjoy every moment of their life. Through the College years, the picture of life is different from it's in the future with hard work and busy time. Every thing may seem more difficult and complicated than they are during College time.

Finally, although students may struggle with some difficult subjects to study in College, they are able to prepare for their future life. They obtain many valuable experiences from their classmates and are ready to start their work to gain the goals.

PLEASE SEE MY ESSAY AS A TOEFL ESSAY, AND LET ME KNOW ABOUT MY MISTAKES.
BAHAREH
KathyLala 20 / 116  
Sep 21, 2011   #2
I like your agrument, I agree with you that life in college is more simple and less responsible than life after college. I have some ideas for you

=> "Enjoyment" is the only thing that I remember from my college years (remember, college-NO cap)

=>..."which leads to make a useful connection for student' future" =>I'm not really sure what does it mean, maybe this => which contribute a great help to students' learning.

=> Students can learn many knowledge and experience from their foreign friends which's not been discussed before.=> They can learn others' cultures from their foreign friends

=> For instance, I remember my best friend Sara who was a Japanese

=> Believed it or not (delete this)

=> Beside...=>Besides...

=>... who helps students to find out about their favorite subject to continue and get ready to reach a good qualification for that...=>rewrite this sentence

=> For example, candidate teachers in Ontario in Canada are required one year college teaching to be qualified as a teacher in this province.

=>..this experience helps them to have a better view of teaching through their internship work, (which is provided by College=>not sure what does it mean?)

=>there is the most enjoying time that has ever been experienced by everybody through his or her College life. That is the only time with no responsibility for any matters (are you sure?) (this two sentences you can combine)=>...college years are the enjoyable time in life because students wouldn't have heavy of family responsibility

=> thus, learners try their time to go out or party with their friends and enjoy every moment of their life=>thus, learners would have efficient time to study and to hang out with friend as well OR...learners would have more time going out with friends, which helps them reduce stress from school work

=> Every thing may seem more difficult and complicated than they are during College time (everything, I would change to life matters)
OP bahareh 18 / 50  
Sep 21, 2011   #3
Thankyou so much for your suggestion Katty. I tried to rewrite whole my essay with your comments.
how do you think about my essay as a tofle essay?Do you think I'm far away of getting a good score for this test?

bahareh
rayganwebster94 1 / 3  
Sep 23, 2011   #4
I really like this essay. I think it's helpful to me because, I'm a senior in high school right now and I didn't get that experience yet, but reading your thread gave me some ideas. = )


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