Unanswered [2] / Urgent [0]
 

Home / Writing Feedback /     

dissuade students from pursuing fields of study in which they are unlikely -Education


answers: 4
Apr 11, 2011, 06:50am   #1
[Revised GRE]-I-3- Educational institutions have a responsibility to dissuade students from pursuing fields of study in which they are unlikely to succeed.

The speaker says that the education system should help students to chose the fields which they suitable and interesting and in order to help them to get success .while I concede that it is really a good way to dissuade students wasting time and to success sooner, in most cases it is just difficulty to realize.

As we know the key to access success is interesting and suitable. Albert Einstein and Van Gogh are
both famous on their free spirit , but just try to image how weird if Einstein go to paint and Van Gogh go to study physics. If it is really happened what we lost must be far beyond only two masters...
SEE BELOW

Apr 11, 2011, 07:19am   #2
The speaker says that the education system should help students to chose the fields which are suitable and interesting in order to help them get success .while I concede that it is really a good way to dissuade studentsfrom wasting time and to succeed sooner, in most cases it is just difficult to realize .

As we know the key to accessing success is interesting and feasible. Albert Einstein and Van Gogh are
both famous on their free spirit , but just try to imagine how weird if Einstein go to paint and Van Gogh go to study physics. If it really happened what we lost must be far beyond only two masters but the great science and art culture. So if we can formulate a education system which have the function to help students to choose their interesting and suitable subjects there will be more ambitious young man .

However, it is very difficult to build suchan education system. Because it is a system which could not[font#FF0000] be as smart as a psychologist who have insight about human being's characteristics and could not have some magic power like the sorting hat in HARRY POTTER[/font]. The educational resource limit the possibility of founding such system either. So in most situations choosing which field to study largely depend on students themselves. For instance ,Mark Zucherberg ,the founder of FACEBOOK ,who choose to give up studying psychology in Harvard and found FACEBOOK .He is the richest young man in the world now. So we can tell that choosing ability belong students' is much more useful and powerful.

Of course it will be better if we intend to design a education system not only focusing on teaching knowledge or cultural logical mind but also help students to choose the subject which are really suitable and interesting. For example ,we can employ some experts to design the professional survey and after collecting and analyzing the results the school could provide some advices to students .Or schools can offer more optional courses about the interacting subjects so student could find such matching feel by choosing different courses. But all of these are just suggestions .the decision is made by students of course .

In sum, interest and appropriateness are very important to go to success .No better than If a smart education system which can help students to choose the best field to strive is built. But before this students should afford this responsibility to make the right decision for their lives to get success.
[font#FF0000][/font]
Apr 11, 2011, 08:46am   #3
The speaker says that the education system should help students to chose the fields which are suitable and interesting and in order to help them to get success .while I concede that it is really a good way to dissuade students from wasting time and to success sooner, in most cases it is just difficulty to realize.

As we know the key to accessing success is interesting and suitable. Albert Einstein and Van Gogh are
both famous on their free spirit , but just try to image how weird if Einstein go to paint and Van Gogh go to study physics. If it is really happened what we lost must be far beyond only two masters but the great science and art culture. So if we can design a education system which have the function to help students to choose their interesting and suitable subjects there are will be more ambitious young man .

However, it is very difficult to build such an education system. Because the system could not be as smart as a psychologist who have insight about human being's characteristics and could not have some magic power like the sorting hat in HARRY POTTER,and the educational resource limit the possibility of founding such education either. So in the mostly situations choosing which field to study almost depend students themselves. For instance ,Mark Zucherberg ,the founder of FACEBOOK ,who choose to give up studying psychology in Harvard and found FACEBOOK .He is the richest young man in the world now. So we can tell that the students' decision is much more useful and powerful.

Of course it will be better if we intend to design a education system not only focusing on teaching knowledge or culturing logical mind but also help students to choose the subject which they real suitable and interesting. For example ,employing some experts design the professional survey and after collecting and analyzing the results the school could provide some advices to students .By the way schools can offer more optional courses about the interact subject so student could find such matching feel by choosing different courses. But all of these are just suggestions the decision should be made by students of course .

In sum, interesting and suitable is very important to go to success .It is appreciable If a smart education system which can help students to choose the best field to strive built. But before this students should afford the responsibility of making the right decision for their lives .
nini1008:
.while I concede that it is really a good way to dissuade students from wasting time and to success sooner, in most cases it is just difficulty to realize.

Do not use "while" to start a sentence this way. Change that period to a comma:
The speaker says that the education system should help students to chose the fields which are suitable and interesting and in order to help them to get success, while I concede that it is really...

Also, CONCEDE is not the right word. It means to give up and admit the other person is correct. If I concede a point, it means I admit I was wring. So, use the word "assert" instead.

For instance ,Mark Zucherberg, the founder of FaceBook, who choose chose to give up studying...

So we can tell that the students' decision decisions are much more useful and powerful.

In sum, the chance to pursue an interesting and suitable field of study is very important when aspiring toward success.

:-)



Home / Writing Feedback /

Thread closed ✓