Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


Climate changes is a threat to our planet, but there is not enough political pressure


sandeepkale 3 / 4  
Sep 7, 2010   #1
Today has a lot of evidences that our environmental temperature is getting hotter day by day with our individual and collective activities. Global warming is a serious problem for coming generation. Our living standard, industrial development, rapidly increasing automobiles, deforesting, unlimited usages of petroleum and explosion of population all are its reason.

There are a number of reasons behind climate changing, first, over exploitation of natural resources like petroleum, that creates carbon monoxide and carbon dioxide after burning which observe heat and that is why temperature is getting up every year. Secondly, to implement human's infrastructures woods and forests has been continuously cutting down since immemorial time. Furthermore, industries wastage of acids and chemicals is very harmful for water creatures as well as human and environment. In addition, large number of vehicles every year is on the roads is just not more bigger threat to our climate. However, environment condition is just not worse as it may be in future. Therefore solution for such dilemma must be obliged.

However, to control changing climate Government can play most important role. There should be environment department is each country to understand the problems that up set the apple cart of balance climate conditions. Government should provide more funds to plant new trees that maintain the balance of our nature. Most biggest problem is air pollution, that, should be over come by applying new roles and methods. Government ought to deploy campaign to motivate riding of bicycle and pedestrian walking on foot.

Hence, a conclusion can be drawn from from above main problems that must be prohibited, to control over changing climate. Participation of government would be more appreciative if it bans on over use of natural resources and try to find new subordinate usage of energy. It should start campaign to guide people against environmental crisis and inspire people to grow plants and more greenery to maintain balance between oxygen and carbon dioxide.
PurpleBook 1 / 9  
Sep 7, 2010   #2
Your essay showed that you indeed had knowledge on global warming.
But I felt that you could have talked about the negative effects of global warming before going on to talk about reasons for global warming and measures to be taken to counter to global warming.

Global warming is a serious problem for coming generation.

Explain why is it a serious problem.

I thought the reasons you have stated were good. But you could have linked some together:

There is a number of reasons behind the changing climate. Namely the over-exploitation of natural resources such as petroluem for the increasing number of vehicles on the roads; deforestation to meet the demands of the ever-rising human population. Such activities increases the concentration of greenhouse gases in the atmosphere, thereby increasing the global temperature..

Furthermore, industries wastage of acids and chemicals is very harmful for water creatures as well as human and environment.

If your topic is Climate changes, I fail to see the linkage between this line and the topic. Harmful, in what way? Does it cause climatic changes?

Emm, I think your measures to control climatic changes could've been more general instead of only focusing all the responsibilities on the government. So perhaps:

World organisations such as the United Nations can come to hold campaigns.. Countries to sign agreements to limit greenhouse gas admissions.. Other than the bans and agreements, that are only 'hard' measures to stop the alteration of climates by man, man needs to know the negative impacts of climatic changes so as to truly sense the need to control the climatic changes and thus to come up with even more productive ways of countering to that change. Education is the key to that..

I thought your essay was good already,
I just wanted to share my ideas too :D
I hope it did some help :]

Do retaliate if what I wrote seem to have some inaccuracies.
Its all about learning!
Thankyou!


Home / Writing Feedback / Climate changes is a threat to our planet, but there is not enough political pressure
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳