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IELTS: Children should learn foreign language at primary school; 'hard to focus'


lindalinda007 1 / -  
Mar 26, 2013   #1
task 2: some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school.
do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Is it better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school? This question is becoming a commonly issue in the society. We should compare the advantage of this with the disadvantages.

In my opinion, the advantages obviously outweigh the disadvantages. At first, the younger a child is, the faster he (or she) learns new stuff. A primary school student is much more imaginative than a secondary school student, and pupils are eager to accept fresh things. Moreover, pupils have fewer lessons than the secondary school students who must take time on history, geography, and so on. Pupils have only three to five lessons to take.

Apparently, there are advantages for the middle school students of learning foreign languages. For instance, they have stronger self-control ability than pupils, so that they can really focus on learning. However, middle school students are easier to regard learning as boring things, which leads learning less efficiently. Meanwhile, they must deal with a couple of lessons in a term. The time they can spend on language is really limited.

To conclude, students should begin learning a new language at primary school. Although as a child, he or she may hard to focus on study, parents and teachers can guide them by effective methods.

please give me some advice on my essay. I really have no idea how to enhance my level. thank you so much.
Xiaokai Jin 11 / 23 5  
Mar 26, 2013   #2
lindalinda007

Hi, at first, I think it's a good essay. And I want to say I think if you can make your second argument clearer, your essay would be better. I mean, in your second point of view, you said middle school students are easier to regard learning new language as something boring, but what about kids in elementary school? Aren't they much easier distracted by other things and more likely to be tired of studying? So I think maybe you can choose a new angle to express your point of view.

I, myself, am also going to take a Toefl exam so my advice may be not so incisive and helpful. But if it could help you, I will be happy.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Mar 26, 2013   #3
This question is becoming a commonlycommon issue in the society.

.... I think this is too much of a generalizaion. In my view, this is not a common issue in the society, but an argument only.

I feel you better pay attention to your essay structure. Introduce your topic theme to the reader and then state your opinion. That's what you need to do in the introduction.

In my opinion, the advantages obviously outweigh the disadvantages

... This needs to go to your introduction.

At first, the younger a child is, the faster he (or she) learns new stuff.

....this is grammatically incorrect;
First, a younger child is faster in learning compared to a grown up.


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