samilli 1 / 3 Jul 10, 2013 #1Technology has changed and impacted the world so tremendously that humans cannot spend their everyday lives without it. While these advancements have made life as we know it much easier, they have not necessarily made it better.One of the most renowned technological weapons, and probably the most deadly, is the atom bomb. The atomic bomb has made the Allied countries lives' easier by quickly ending World War II. However the atom bomb has not changed anyone's lives for the better, especially not for the Japanese. The long term effects of the bomb are even worse than the bomb itself because it exposed the Japanese to radiation poisoning, cancer, and later death.Factories have made lives easier because they efficiently produce products used in everyday lives on a large scale. However, factories have not changed lives for the better. In fact, they have made lives even worse due to the pollution caused by factory emissions.Even though technological changes advancements in weaponry and machinery has made many lives easier,it has definitely not changed anyone' s lives for the better because the harmful long-term effects those changes come with.
Precious Rex 1 / 7 Jul 11, 2013 #2Sorry to say but your last two paragraphs are shallow (I know It's a sat essay ). If you could add a little layer explaining why you feel weapons and factories do not make life better would obviously give you better marks.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592 Jul 12, 2013 #4Technology has changed and impacted the world so tremendouslythat humans cannot spend their everyday lives without it... that humans have become too much dependent on technology to manage their everyday life.While these advancements have made life as we know it much easier, they have not necessarily made it better.... I removed that part due to redundancy.atom bomb... atomic bombAre you within the expected word count?
wakingdream - / 2 2 Jul 12, 2013 #6I don't think renowned was the best adjective to use. Maybe notorious would have been better.And try varying you sentence structure cos all your sentences are too similar. Finally get a stronger conclusion
OP samilli 1 / 3 Jul 13, 2013 #7no specific word count was given, thanks!!It is hard to write more with a 30 minute time limit, so I was just trying to work well with what I had.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592 Jul 14, 2013 #8Allied countries lives'... be a bit more descriptive.... may be people have forgotten the details of WW2 :D ...lolthe lives of Allied countries of World War 2It is hard to write more with a 30 minute time limit, so I was just trying to work well with what I had..... set time and practice. I also feel this is too short. But with practicing you'd improve a lot.
