[IELTS] attitude to Space Research

Some people think space research is a waste of money. The government should spend money on the improvement of people's living conditions. What is your opinion?

In present, the breakthroughs and advances in technology have transformed our life, and enable the scientists to conduct various scientifical researches such as space research. Yet at the same time, it is a heated issue that whether it is necessary to spend so much money on a single experiment. Some people argue that space research is solely a waste of money, and government should invest in the expenditure relating to citizen's wellbeing. In my personal view, I find this view unconvincing for at least two reasons.

First of all, like the scientifical researches in the past, space research is also the foundation upon which science and technology developments can be achieved. For example, from Newton to Kepler, their achievements based on the observations of space not only contribute a lot to the theory in math and physics, but also render people better identify the role of human being and the future of the earth as well. More specifically, the Apollo landing affords us sufficient data to analyze and study, which is valuable to exploit the nature of outer space.

Besides, human race all over the world can be the beneficiaries of space research, soon or later. Apparently, there have been many successful applications such as innovations in biometric engineering field due to the outcome of space research. The crop yield could be improved a lot if they are cultivated in the environment similar to the space. Furthermore, the final goal of space research is to find a replacement of the earth in case that one day our global village is no longer suitable to live in. Thus, it is imperative to encourage government to spend on this study.

However, we cannot deny the cost of space research is too huge; even though, the future of this project is certainly promising for the society as a whole. Maybe the government should strike a balance between the scientifical research and the people's living condition.

To sum up, we should trust and support the authorities' decisions about space research which may beyond our knowledge and eyesight. Also, all nations should unite together to combat the challenging task-that is the space research-which seems difficult to conquer for any single nation. [366]

Plz place more emphasis on the opening paragraph and the top sentences of each body paragraph.
I need your suggestions, thank you.

Real Fog,
Thanks a lot.
I didn't notice that I've made so many mistakes such as 's' and 'the/a'.
And your tips are useful to me.
Once again, thanks.

I think this paragraph is redundant and maybe even can cause some harm to your essay. I don't see the point of mentioning any shortcomings of your subject. Instead, be like a pit bull - keep your thesis between the jaws and never, never give it up. I know it is logical to show the other side of the coin, but logical does not means it would actually bring any benefits for your work as a whole. In a nutshell - do not broach any possible weak points in your thesis :)

Your essay is pretty good, though :)

Well, I just got an idea of how you can incorporate that... You can compare a "little flaw" in your thesis to a "giant crack" in the opposite viewpoint. It is called "comparing gray to black" and if used skillfully, it may add a lot of color :)

I did not catch your point at all, can you do me a favor and give me an example?

I just read this paragraph carafully, and I found it kind of useless, even weaking my point.
If I can give some suggestions which are effective to promote the quality of people's lives
except cancelling the space research, it seems more complete and convincing.

Right?

Don't say scientifical. It is like this: scientific research such as space research.

First of all, like the scientific research in the past, space research is also the foundation upon which science and technology developments can be achieved.

Besides, the human race all over the world can be the beneficiary of space research, sooner or later. ----I changed it to beneficiary, because the human race is one thing. Ont thing is a beneficiary, but you could also write it like this:

Humans all over the world can be the beneficiaries of space research.

However, we cannot deny the cost of space research is too huge; even though nevertheless, the future of this project is certainly promising for the society as a whole. ----You have many great sentences! It seems that you think in a complex, profound way.

To sum up, we should trust and support the authorities' decisions about space research which may beyond our knowledge and eyesight. ------ I think we should educate ourselves and take action to express our opinions. We are supposed to be the authorities who decide how the government spends money.

:-)

I agree with with the above mentioned things... Speaking about the balance which was mentioned in the essay, I should say that there is a balance.The money spent in order to help people goes to the pocket of the authorities. Have u recently heard about the news of Madonna? She gave about more than 10 million dollars to built a new school or a camp something like this in Africa. It was sooner discovered that 4 million of that money was not used in proper ways. The principal of that school used that money on golf, car and other things. The problem is that those people who are in need do not receive money totally. What do you think? Thanks for reading my answer...

birdman
Yes, after watching the film "inside the job", I felt that the mass are often treated like kids by the authorities.
Although the money is said to be spent on the public affairs, we insist that it is the govenments' business, not the taxpayers'.

You are right kelp0308

^0^
Add some my advices~
I had wrote some similar topic. After reading yours, I found maybe the beginning was overlong and the support evidence in main body was a little weak. Besides, the sentenses could be more changable.

All in all, better than me~~