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Assignment: Is it best to determine how wise people are by how happy they are?


JangGemini 8 / 51 12  
May 28, 2013   #1
This is one of SAT assignments. I really hope to receive some contributive comments for my essay, especially a score for it. Please help me! I'm having a real SAT examination on this Saturday! Thanks in advance!

Happiness has always been the final and the most important purpose in a human life. Personally, I always completely believe that it is best to determine how wise people are by how happy they are. Nick Vujicic, a no-limb 30-year-old man, truly believes that happiness is the only thing he wishes for his son. Another epitomized example is Peter Pan, a boy who never grows up and always thinks of happy things, defeat a captain named James Hook.

The story of Nick Vujicic is widely famous and noted by millions people all over the world. He is a disabled person without limbs, which made him almost give up when he was 10. But eventually, he proved that people like him can do many things for this world. He is now a speaker and has already come to 24 nations to inspire positive thoughts of life. He has come to Vietnam recently and when Nick was asked that what he wants his son to be, Nick said "I want my son to be happy." That is not only his expectation for his son but also my parents' expectation for me and my brother. Nick said he doesn't care how successful people are, how much money they have, the only thing he cares is how they love. Love is a symbol of happiness.

Mention happiness, we can't forget Peter Pan, who is an intelligent boy comes from Neverland, never grows up and always thinks of happiness. His nemesis is captain James Hook, an evil pirate who always attempt to kill Peter. When James Hook received the miracle dust from Tinker Bell and found out that Peter Pan can fly because he always thinks of happiness, James started trying to put Peter down. Peter loves Wendy, a girl he met but James Hook said she doesn't love Peter, Peter was terribly upset. Hook treated and befuddled Peter, which was a wise strategy at that time. All of a sudden, Wendy reversed the situation by kissing Peter. Hook again embarked himself into the fight with Peter and when Hook almost fell into the ocean, he tried to think about happy things. However Wendy and Peter applied the same strategy to Hook, which made him lose the faith. Hook eventually died because he couldn't think of a single happy idea.

Two examples above showed that happiness is extremely important but to find it is not easy, to keep it is even harder because people sometimes put each other down to achieve their goals. Everything we do for ourselves, for our family and friends, we do it with the hope of happiness. Undoubtedly, happiness is rarely present in this pace of life, that's why I truly believe that only wise people can realize and know how to find and keep it.
shaddy 17 / 47 7  
May 29, 2013   #2
Happiness has always been the final and the most important purpose in a human life.

yes indeed..

You wrote very well. I can not see any grammatical mistake.

It is subject to the knowledgeable persons on the forum.
OP JangGemini 8 / 51 12  
May 29, 2013   #3
Really? That encourages me so much xD Thank you thank you!! I thought no one would fix it for me :( There were so many other essays... Everyone seems to accelerate these days...


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