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Both art and science greatly influence our world in a positive manner - Artists vs scientists


Vns9x 102 / 236 16  
Nov 13, 2014   #1
It is generally agreed that society benefits from the work of its
members. Compare the contributions of artists to society with the
contributions of scientists to society. Which type of contribution do
you think is valued more by your society? Give specific reasons to
support your answer

Both art and science greatly influence our world in a positive manner. While scientists consolidate many lives in this world by supplying us with many technologies and medicines. In the meantime, artist make our life more alive and intriguing due to some of their unique pictures. This essay will clarify both types of contributions and its consequences.

When it comes to the contributions that scientists have made, it is impossible to even imagine ourselves how all their technologies and medicines have supported us. By using technologies such as Internet and robots, they facilitated all our daily routine and thus our life now is more comfortable comparing to the life without any technologies. To clarify, envision yourself possessing the Internet, you will most likely have an advantage in comparison to those who do not have it since Internet is the utility that can provide you with numerous information in an instant. Along with an endless information, you now can freely communicate with your relatives who live at the end of the map. As a result, the Internet benefits every single person on this planet in many ways. In terms of medicine, scientists manage to create an abundance of remedies that can even cure many diseases and illnesses such as cancer, HIV or even worse. The result is obvious, scientists are the people who have successfully converted our life into something safer and easier.

Artists also contribute to our society a plenty of things such as arts. By drawing those pictures, our life has become more lively and dynamic. People now have something to indulge about since pictures can easily alter our mindset and our view of this cruel world. It can either be positive or negative but most of the time it is positive. Therefore, artists make our life seems to be more adventurous and exciting.

So, I definitely believe that scientists' contributions are more precious comparing to the artist's one owing to fact that they facilitate our life in various ways and without them I do not consider that we will able as human beings survive for that long on this planet.
Elaschanzky 4 / 8 4  
Nov 13, 2014   #2
While scientists consolidate many lives in this world by supplying us with many technologies and medicines.
In the meantime, artist make our life more alive and intriguing due to some of their unique pictures(try something like 'works' or 'creations').
To clarify, envision yourself possessing the Internet... this example really adds to your substance!
Even though I do not agree with your answer to the prompt, I do feel this is a pretty strong response! ;-)
You could evaluate artists a little more in terms of forms of art other than drawing (i.e. painting, sculpting, composing... so on).
Overall, good job!
shanexo 2 / 2 1  
Nov 13, 2014   #3
Is there a word limit to this essay? I feel like your argument could be drawn out a little more. What about talking about the political value that art could have, or how it can be cathartic, and brings out emotions in people and influences them?

In this sentence, "By using technologies such as the Internet and robots, they facilitated all our daily routine and thus our life now is more comfortable as comparing to the life without any technologies."

You should add the word "the" before Internet, and change "comparing" to "as compared to", since you're writing in past tense.

Good job so far, you just maybe need to elaborate a bit further if you can. Hope this helps!


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