Do you agree that every organization has a right to set age maximum for the candidates ?

Some workplaces set age maximums for applicants even though they are far away from the retirement age .Do you agree that every organization has a right to set age maximum for the candidates ?

In our contemporary world most of the both governmental and private organizations are determining age limits for their staff. From my perspective, it is not the right management policy for companies and setting these restrictions in unfair towards employees.

Some people believe that imposing age maximums to the code of any organizations improves the quality of the job performed as well as raising the productivity. Moreover, they tend to consider that upgrading personnel each period of time enables companies to attract more young people who are seen as new blood for the company.

In a stark contrast, updating staff all the time can lead to several consequences. First and foremost, it means that any employee will not have any job security which is the most essential issue in job performance . Whenever a worker feels secure ,the concerns of his will be related to the benefits of the company. Moreover, if there are some age limits in a workplace ,after being fired most of the workers will not be able to find a proper workplace for themselves which can raise the probability to unemployed as a result . These obstacles in long run can ,in turn, inflame age discrimination within the society and even uprisings thus troubling economic and social stability of the whole country.

Another point that should be taken into account is experience of people working for a long time at one place. The more a person works at the same work area , the better master of his job he becomes . Indeed, it would be much more beneficial for organizations to hire youngsters and let them cooperate with the elderly , so that they could exchange knowledge and experience that they possess.

Deducing from the points mentioned above , I once more reaffirm my position that setting age limits is unjust towards employees. I believe that both younger and elderly generations should be encouraged to perform their jobs cooperatively to avoid age discrimination and any detrimental outcomes.

I think you should add the comma in
In our contemporary world, most of the both governmental and private organizations are determining age limits for their staff. From my perspective, it is not the right management policy for companies and setting these restrictions in unfair towards employees.

... this sentences does not flow clearly due to weak word organization.
In this contemporary world, many organizations, both in government and private sector, determine the retirement age for their staff.
Well, I wonder why you had "contemporary world" in this sentence. What does it refer to? For me, I find those words redundant and do not add any meaning to this sentence. This is your hook which opens your essay and therefore it needs to capture the reader's attention strongly. Hook should be relevant to the topic and presented more attractively.

alex90
well thanks your help

Hi, Dumi, I agree with your comments very much, I usually used this kind of opennings: "In our contemporary world" or "In our modern societies". I think it makes no sense and it is very boring. However, I don't know how to change this situation. Could you please give me some examples about how to give a hook?

Thank you very much!

Hey...don't worry, with practice you'll get over it :D
You need a good hook to start with. This hook should be relevant to your topic and provide an entrance to your essay. Let's take this topic;


.... First, get the main idea of it - this one deals with retirement age! So tell something catchy about that;
Retirement age differs form organization to organization. ... this is more relevant to your topic. Now you can start talking about the background of the issue that how some organization act on retirement age.