Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 9


IELTS - advantages and disadvantages of machines instead of human to do the work


duo008 6 / 39 5  
Apr 9, 2014   #1
With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machines are now able to do the work which people used to perform. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

The issue of whether using of machine are bring many advantages to society is of great concern to many people. In my opinion, although using machines have many benefits, we cannot ignore its negative effects.

It is undoubted that machines can bring many benefits. For one thing, machines are more effective than human. Not like human, machines do not need rest, which means they can work as long as employers want and consistently produce high quality products without any mistakes. For another, using machines can save company's money. Because machines never ask for salary, over-time pay or pension, so employers do not need to spend money on employee's welfare. The company only needs some technicians to make sure machines are working on the right track or replace some part when machines are not working.

However, the disadvantages of machines that bring to us should not be neglected by people. To start with, because of extensive of using machines, many people loss their job. Especially in large population countries, high unemployment rate may cause crime and social instability. Apart from this, using of machines are also pose serious pollution and energy dissipation. For example, nowadays people prefer to use dish-washing machine to wash dishes and plates rather than hand washing. But they did not know that compared with hand washing dish-washing machine consume at least 2 times water and electricity to wash these tableware. As you can imagine, if thousands of families use dish-washing machines, how many water and how much electricity will be wasted!

In conclusion, although we cannot deny machines are play a vital role in people living and working, problems posed by machines should draws more attentions as well.
Abdurasul 32 / 86 4  
Apr 9, 2014   #2
The issue of whether using of machine are bring many advantages to society is of great concern to many people. In my opinion, although using machines have many benefits, we cannot ignore its negative effects.

You have to give a hook(an interesting statement to catch the reader's attention). Plus, your first sentence is quite disorganized.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Apr 9, 2014   #3
The issue of whether using of machines are bringbrings many advantages to society is of great concern to many people.

In my opinion, although using machines have many benefits, we cannot ignore its negative effects.

.... very good :)

. Not like human, machines do not need rest,

Hey, sometimes we need to switch off machines to give them a break :D ... this line sounds a bit unrealistic
OP duo008 6 / 39 5  
Apr 9, 2014   #4
Hey, sometimes we need to switch off machines to give them a break :D ... this line sounds a bit unrealistic

yeah, I see. :D

thanks , i'll try other reason for it
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Apr 9, 2014   #5
It is undoubted that machines can bring many benefits. For one thing, machines are more effective than human. Not like human, machines do not need rest, which means they can work as long as employers want and consistently produce high quality products without any mistakes. For another, using machines can save company's money. Because machines never ask for salary, over-time pay or pension, so employers do not need to spend money on employee's welfare. The company only needs some technicians to make sure machines are working on the right track or replace some part when machines are not working.

Well, I think machines are more efficient than human in terms of accuracy and output. Machines can produce results with more accuracy because they are made to follow the instruction to the last point. Also, the output levels are much higher than humans as they do not feel tired or they get distracted by any emotions or feelings as you have mentioned above. :D

The above para is good, but your reasoning there should have been more focused to the point. The examples are very good :)
OP duo008 6 / 39 5  
Apr 9, 2014   #6
Well, I think machines are more efficient than human in terms of accuracy and output. Machines can produce results with more accuracy because they are made to follow the instruction to the last point. Also, the output levels are much higher than humans as they do not feel tired or they get distracted by any emotions or feelings as you have mentioned above. :D

Wow,that is a very good example for me, THANKS!!!!
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Apr 9, 2014   #7
To start with, because of extensive of usinguse of machines, many people losslose their jobs .... you can also say this idea;
To begin with, machines replace human involvement in completing a task and due to this fact, man power is replaced by them and many people are laid off from their jobs.

Especially in large population countries with larger populations, high unemployment rate may cause crime andsevere social instability and economic issues.
OP duo008 6 / 39 5  
Apr 10, 2014   #8
thanks for you corrections!!!
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 14, 2014   #9
I feel this sentence contains many words and has faulty comparison between human and machines: "It is undoubted that machines can bring many benefits. For one thing, machines are more effective than human."

Be effective:Machines bring significant benefits for humans.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS - advantages and disadvantages of machines instead of human to do the work
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳