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ADVANTAGES OF CITY LIVING AND COUNTRY LIVING, can you help me with this?


answers: 3
Nov 22, 2008, 11:25am   #
Some people, say that living in the countryside is the best choice, because is better for your heath. But from my point of view, I don't agree with this statement, because living in the big cities is more advantageous than living in the countryside. I will show you, the reasons why living in the big cities is better in the following paragraphs.
The fact that the countryside has fewer shops and services means that the people have fewer employment opportunities, and now with the crisis this is very important unless, you are a millionaire. Living in big cities is easily to connect the several services such as the hospitals, the filling stations, the cinemas, the restaurants and the department stores because of the better communication and transport system. If the people in countryside want to connect these services, they have to take a long distance probably the nearest hospital is at least at 30Km, and if you have an emergency, this is a lot of time. Hospitals in the big cities are abreast of the times, have more new technologies and innovations, and just at five minutes from your house.
In addition, living in the big cities offers you a variety of things to do in comparison to country living like shopping centers (where you can go when it is a cold day and you want to go for a walk with your girlfriend). In the countryside during the day you can walk, run or go with your bike. But when it gets dark you have to stay at home.
However, people have different reasons for choose their place for living. Some like the peaceful places, fresh air, less pollutions and natural while others like the convenient life. Choose the appropriate place for your and your family life styles.
Good morning :)

Here are my thoughts:

"Some people, say that living in the countryside is the best choice, because it is better for your Avoid using the pronouns "you" and "your" in formal academic writing; try using "me," "I," or "one" instead. heath. But Avoid using transitory/conjunctive words such as "but," "so," or "and" when beginning sentences. from my point of view, I don't Avoid contractions in formal academic writing, as they are inappropriate. agree with this statement, because living in the big city is more advantageous than living in the countryside. I will show you (Remove comma) the reasons why living in the big city is better in the following paragraphs.

The fact that the countryside has fewer shops and services means that the people have fewer employment opportunities, and now with the crisis What crisis are you referring to? this is very important unless, (Remove comma) you are a millionaire. For those living in big cities it is easier to connect the several services such as hospitals, filling stations, cinemas, the restaurants and department stores because of better communication and transport systems. If the people living in the countryside want to connect to these services, they have to travel long distances, perhaps as much as 30Km, and if you have an emergency, this is a lot of time. Hospitals in the big cities are abreast of the times, have more new technologies and innovations, and are just five minutes from your house."

Now, using my suggestions, look carefully through the last section of your essay and see where else you can improve the piece.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com



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