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Writing Feedback


Need advice on improving TOEFL, SAT, GRE and other academic essays?
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Subject Last Reply
Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as mush as motherhood.

1 - PS- I divided Paragraphs from where it says " However in some cultures and countries, mothers are more involved in bringing...

Writing FeedbackHiruni - 02:57am
Hiruni
03:14am
TOEFL: children should be allowed to play computer games(the whole title is written in the message)

1 - When children ask parents to let them play computer games, parents always say no, because they think computer games are too...

Writing FeedbackDearbhailS - Yesterday
dumi
02:21am
TOEFL Essay- People should master on skill only or many different skills.

5 - I think the last examples "one more friend, one more way to go" cannot support your view very well. It can...

Writing FeedbackJiazigao - Jun 24, 2014
DearbhailS
Yesterday
TOEFL - people are way more disparate at the exterior contrary to what they are inside

2 - I think if you can write two examples, this essay can be better. Because this essay does not conclud enough details...

Writing Feedbackshreyansh13 - Jul 28, 2014
DearbhailS
Yesterday
IELTS - 'the chart also predicts the proportions in 2040' - quantity of the population aged 65

2 - Thank you :)

Writing FeedbackHiruni - Jul 30, 2014
Hiruni
Yesterday
IELTS 2: CONSIDERING DISADVANTAGES OF TOURISM

5 - it seems an introduction, not a conclusion

Writing Feedbackeirehc - Jul 15, 2014
fikri
Yesterday
IELTS: some people think the government should spend more money on science than art. Do you agree ?

2 - i don't understand thiss sentence

Writing Feedbacksky1997 - Jul 21, 2014
fikri
Yesterday
Ielts: Can environmental problems be solved by individuals?

4 - Sometimes, the best way to think of ideas for an essay is to start with an example. One good example can...

Writing Feedbackningo - Jul 29, 2014
fikri
Yesterday
IELTS Essay - Appropriate age of adulthood

2 - you wrote some relevant examples which have connection to your society, keep it

Writing Feedbackmsarkar - Jul 29, 2014
fikri
Yesterday
IELTS Museums and art galleries should show artworks of the local culture

4 - it is better when you put a suggestion in your conclusion, but it will be better if you give...

Writing Feedbacksundin928 - Jul 30, 2014
fikri
Yesterday
Ielts: Is it necessary to teach children handwriting?

5 - here is my example,, Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do...

Writing Feedbackningo - Jul 30, 2014
fikri
Yesterday
TOEFL: 'ancient people lived a natural life' - Now it's easier to maintain health

5 - Thank you so much!! These replies are so helpful!

Writing FeedbackStevenKuang - Jul 30, 2014
StevenKuang
Yesterday
Some cultures value more the elderly people, while others paid more attention on young generation

4 - It is a little bit difficult to provide more meaningful feedbacks without seeing your full prompt. However, I guess this is...

Writing FeedbackGulnar604 - Jul 27, 2014
Pahan
Yesterday
'children in Gaza' - Pre-Toefl - Childhood is not always a happiest time of people's life

5 - Yes, I quite agree with Ahmad :) What he has suggested is the most appropriate approach because it...

Writing FeedbackSarah Gharavi - Jul 29, 2014
Pahan
Yesterday
Learning a new language process

2 - I don't have any prompt. I am studying for an University proficiency exam.(We can say IELTS maybe) Thanks.

Writing Feedbackkbektas - Jul 30, 2014
kbektas
Yesterday
Change of career and living place has more positive effect on the whole society and the individual

3 - Although this has brought some disadvantages, there are still many positive effects on the society and the individual. On one...

Writing Feedbackdigitalidea - Jul 30, 2014
dumi
Yesterday
Effects of sexual abuse and injustice on the personal lives of countless females today

1 - You need to check on your first line structure. It should be something like this, "In this world, we are constantly...

Writing Feedbacklydiuta - Jul 28, 2014
nathan2014
Jul 30, 2014
The bar chart shows the amount of sales in silver goods in 000's of units for two companies nextyear

2 - Where is the picture? Readers will share thoughtful feedback if you include the picture of the graph. Also, you should write...

Writing FeedbackGulnar604 - Jul 30, 2014
eddies
Jul 30, 2014
IELTS: the importance of history - removing this course from school curriculum is unwise

3 - I like the way you present this essay :D How about the time? Did you finish it into 40 minutes?...

Writing FeedbackNZsky - Jul 28, 2014
eddies
Jul 30, 2014
Event letter in ielts exam - "International Day"

1 - Please check the last sentence. The sentence should read "Thank you again for providing us with this great networking event, and...

Writing FeedbackGood2690108411 - Jul 7, 2014
nathan2014
Jul 30, 2014
IELTS: Money as a members of staff reward for their exceptional contribution to the company

9 - but it can play a prime source of energy for them.

Writing FeedbackWillNgo - Jul 27, 2014
Gulnar604
Jul 30, 2014
Home is good place to learn a lot, however school is the best place to learn.

7 - Rephrase the conclusion. Don't use the same words as in the prompt.

Writing Feedbackapanwar01 - Jul 2, 2014
msarkar
Jul 29, 2014
IELTS: One of advertising's drawbacks - purchasing not necessary products

5 - Please follow 4 or 5 paragraph layout. 1st - Introduction Paragraph 2/3/4 - Supporting Paragraphs 5 - Conslusion

Writing FeedbackJuliet Ngo - Jul 25, 2014
msarkar
Jul 29, 2014
IELTS - Compulsory voluntary work is a contradiction, and not only in a literal way

2 - Follow this approach for the introduction paragraph: 1. Start with an interesting statement to catch the reader's attention 2....

Writing FeedbackBurguete - Jul 27, 2014
msarkar
Jul 29, 2014
IELTS: The contribution of agriculture, manufacturing and business sectors to the UK economy

4 - Is that really necessary ? Would you mind giving me an example of the overview sentence for this ?...

Writing Feedbackmanutd9111993 - Jul 29, 2014
manutd9111993
Jul 29, 2014
More and more people now choose to wear the fashionable clothes.

9 - No need for repeating "In the world today". I rewrite like this: It results in the growing tendency in which...

Writing Feedbacksundin928 - Jul 23, 2014
ningo
Jul 29, 2014
'In countries like Japan, the population is getting older' - aging population essay Ielts

1 - Even this essay opens for discussion, it is nicer if you could state your point of view in end of...

Writing Feedbackrachelye - Jul 28, 2014
eddies
Jul 29, 2014
IELTS Detailed description of crimes on newspaper and TV can have bad consequences on society

1 - If you want to write a balanced answer for an "agree or disagree" question, it's important to get the introduction right....

Writing Feedbacksundin928 - Jul 28, 2014
fikri
Jul 28, 2014
'Travel is the thing, that makes you richer' - Semester at Sea Essay

NEW - I havent thought of a title yet but let me know Semester at Sea Essay One of my favorite...

Writing Feedbackoreillee - Jul 28, 2014
IELTS: The pie charts indicate different percentages of expenditure on seven items

1 - The pie charts indicate different percentages of expenditure on seven items in US from 1966 to 1996 in 1966 and 1996....

Writing Feedbackdigitalidea - Jul 25, 2014
manutd9111993
Jul 28, 2014
Fast Internet connection is a source of great entertainment

2 - it is a very good essay!!!thanks~ it help me a lot!

Writing Feedbackhoanghonn97 - Jul 27, 2014
sundin928
Jul 28, 2014
IELTS academic task one .. bar chart - coffee and meat consumption

4 - Well, you need to change your current approach for this task. This task is to assess your report writing capabilities. So,...

Writing Feedbackmo7ammed1986 - Jun 28, 2014
dumi
Jul 28, 2014
Most people believe that adult should provide all child demands, because they not are independent

6 - Sure ......... let's give a try :) Well, you have not followed the approach I suggested. According...

Writing Feedbackhamedmas - Jul 23, 2014
dumi
Jul 28, 2014
Should people be allowed to have cosmetic surgery before the age of 18?

5 - You need to have a better link between these two sentences. This is what I suggest; However, having cosmetic surgery...

Writing Feedbackhwabatte - Jul 24, 2014
dumi
Jul 28, 2014
"THE MAKING OF PAPER UMBRELLAS" - IELTS WRITING TASK 1

1 - You introduce your paper fairly well although I would add more to it. Try to be more descriptive and provide...

Writing Feedbacknhungqnk - Jul 27, 2014
lydiuta
Jul 28, 2014
Some subjects should be optional rather than compulsory

2 - Thanks Panhan :D Education has been viewed as one of the most essential elements aspects of individual and...

Writing Feedbacksundin928 - Jul 27, 2014
sundin928
Jul 27, 2014
IELTS: learning a foreign language early has benefits for an individual but not for the culture

5 - As Pahan showed you how to write a strong introduction, let me discuss a few points for the body 1....

Writing FeedbackHiruni - Jul 26, 2014
eddies
Jul 27, 2014
Topic: Which better? Living in a city or living in the country? why (150 words)

3 - This should be split into two paras - Firstly and Secondly, should go into two separate paragraphs :) Firstly,...

Writing FeedbackNamkeo - Jul 24, 2014
Pahan
Jul 27, 2014
IELTS: I highly recommend authorities to raise the age to leave school to 18

7 - To begin with, the an educational policy that does not allow students to leave school until 18 can bring some economic...

Writing Feedbackbangvuthe - Jun 4, 2014
Pahan
Jul 27, 2014
IELTS - mobile phones: faster communication vs social problems

5 - Furthermore, the growing number of mobiles mobile games will impact their the mental development of children negatively. For instance, there...

Writing FeedbackMy2983189867 - Jun 30, 2014
Pahan
Jul 27, 2014
IELTS Should we invent a new language for people to use for international communication?

4 - On the other hand, if the world has a dominant common language which is shared by all nations and communities,...

Writing Feedbacksundin928 - Jul 26, 2014
Pahan
Jul 27, 2014
IELTS 2- insufficient respect is shown to older people

5 - There are some negative impacts of this bad culture if there is no real action to reflate it. Inadequate respect for...

Writing Feedbackandial - Jun 30, 2014
Pahan
Jul 27, 2014
"Courage, my friends" - Tommy Douglas stands out as one of the greatest Canadian

2 - In fact, Canada is known for its successful Medicare system. Statistic show confirm Canadians are among the healthiest people in...

Writing Feedbackayesha10833 - Jun 9, 2014
dumi
Jul 27, 2014
Adolescents are being influenced badly by untalented people who become famous

5 - First of all, it is true thatAdmittedly, people usespend their money to becomeachieve an inspiration, which is are definitely not a...

Writing Feedbackicebeating - Jun 26, 2014
eddies
Jul 27, 2014
There are more benefits to travel in your own country than travelling in foreign

5 - As per my study, After you Log on to EF, have a look at the new screen that opens...

Writing Feedbackdurai_ielts - Jun 4, 2014
eddies
Jul 27, 2014
Imprisonment trend among five different countries - bar graph

4 - you don't need to write a conclusion for task 1. What you need is to present an overview written after...

Writing FeedbackVihuynh - Jun 30, 2014
eddies
Jul 27, 2014
Some people say that success is "10 percent talent and 90 percent hard work"

3 - This intro is too bulky. Let me give a try for this intro; Success is more likely to...

Writing FeedbackKatyDao - Jun 10, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
Crime in urban areas of America - rough draft

1 - teachers affects a students student's achievement. Without proper education, the possibility of being able to earn a decent...

Writing Feedbackameyer149 - Jul 18, 2014
Hiruni
Jul 26, 2014
It is very boring and monotonous to keep living in the place you were born until you die

2 - First and foremost, there may be more job opportunities available in another area. outside. For example, many people choose to...

Writing Feedbackmandana193 - Jul 26, 2014
dumi
Jul 26, 2014
How the Vietnamese invasion of Cambodia affected the United States-feedback

4 - The Vietnamese invasion of Cambodia also affected people's actions perceptions on war and their behavior (actions and behavior more or less...

Writing Feedbackyodelkid4 - Jun 21, 2014
dumi
Jul 26, 2014
ielts essay about water shortage

11 - You should have included the full prompt of your essay for us to understand what it really requires from you. Fresh...

Writing FeedbackShajiang - Jun 22, 2014
dumi
Jul 26, 2014
Advantages and disadvantages of advertisement ?

4 - As you have pointed out, it is difficult to generalise about IELTS template. You'd better focus on the topic given....

Writing Feedbackemonabin - Jul 24, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
Unpaid community service - "great stepping stone for high school institutions"

5 - It is ok if you put many paragraphs here and there. However, a layout takes an important role when...

Writing Feedbackhillard214james - Jun 23, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
essay: following the host country's culture for visitors

4 - even this essay opens for discussion/ both views, it is always nicer if you state your opinion in the end...

Writing Feedbacklovemylife - Jun 23, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
[IELTS TASK 1] A report about consumption of energy in the USA

8 - bad grammar :( you need a comma in between bad grammar :( are you sure since... to?...

Writing FeedbacktiaDS - Jun 23, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
'healthy diet and adequate exercises' - Methods to improve public health

3 - Are you sure this part of the topic? If it is not, you are off-topic. Please check it...

Writing Feedbackhillard214james - Jun 22, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
IELTS WRITING TASK - 2 Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men

4 - this part contains vague language, which is not clear for me. Please check it I always suggest others...

Writing FeedbackSabi Thapaa - Jun 22, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
some people believe that college student should consider only their own talents

5 - Given this evidence, both group opinions are right, which students should consider parameters when choosing field of study....

Writing Feedbacktgholian - Jun 5, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
IELTS Task 1. MARRIAGES AND DIVORCE IN THE USA & ADULT AMERICANS' MARITAL STATUS

5 - problem with plural form problem with plural form write fluctuation with plural form or put an article...

Writing FeedbackMisnariah Idrus - Jun 19, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
IELTS; all towns and cities to have public spaces

5 - As I suggest to other students to pay attention to "example' they wrote, some students fail to present a clear...

Writing FeedbackMiaCuthbert - Jun 19, 2014
eddies
Jul 26, 2014
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