whs5204 1 / - Dec 1, 2012 #1In my life, there has been many people that have left an impacted. Whether theywere close friends, family, teachers, or strangers no matter how big or smallnone of them compare to the great impact that my father has made. Without myfather's great impact I would not be the person who I am today.My father immigrated to the United States when he was just a teenager. He camein the search for a good job and a better life. My father spent most of hisearly life working in the United States to sustain my mother and siblings backin Mexico. My father did all he could to help his family, even if he has toleave his country for a good job. He did because he didn't not want his familyto suffer economically.My father then decided that we should all be together as a family and broughtus to live with him here in the United States. I was only 3 years old when ithappened and I do not remember much of it. I was to young to understand whatwas happening in my life at that moment, but now I know that coming to thiscountry impacted my life dramatically for the best. I say that my fatherimpacted my life for the best because I do not imagine my life any other way.This great impact in my life was probably the best thing that could ever happento me. When my father brought us to the U.S., he brought us because he wantedhis children to have a good education and a better living. That is exactly whatwe have all because of his hard work and effort. This great impact in benefitme in so many different ways. I can attended to a public High School withouthave to pay. Also I can communicate with people in two different languageswhich I really enjoy being able to do.My Father is a great role model to me and I look up to him all the time.Without my father, my life would not be what it is. He made a great impact inmy life and it is the best thing that could happen to me. My father's propose nbringing his family to the United States was to have a better life then what hedid. He does his best for his family and I am very thankful for all the hardwork he as done to be able to give us the best. My father is the most importantperson in my life, I can not thank him enough for all the great things he hasdone for me.
zdv 12 / 68 2 Dec 1, 2012 #2a lot of grammatical errors. would suggest proofreading it a few times.the essay is mostly about your father and that kind of overshadows you.you're supposed to write how the deeds of a person has helped you to improve yourself not how one action of a person has changed your life.the writing seems very naive.concentrate less on praising the person and more on how the goodness of that person had affected you.excessive use of the word "impact"