2. Write a brief essay in which you respond to the following question.
(freshman applicants only): Johns Hopkins offers 49 majors across the schools of Arts and Sciences and Engineering. On this supplement, we ask you to identify one or two that you might like to pursue here. Why did you choose the way you did? If you are undecided, why didn't you choose? (If any past courses or academic experiences influenced your decision, you may include them in your essay.)
I would greatly appreciate it if someone could look this over. Specifically, i think my example about the sky and how there is uncertainty in it might be unfitting for my message, so if anyone has a better example that would be awesome
The sky is blue. This is certain.
Now, ask any random person why the sky is blue and you will probably not get a straight, correct, or even coherent answer.
There is a degree of uncertainty in most issues regarding the world, whether it be in actual facts or intangible interactions or ideas. The way this uncertainty is accepted, however, defines how the issue is perceived.
It is certain that I want to attend Johns Hopkins University. However it is uncertain what I plan on learning while there. The decision to keep my major undecided was a decision to keep my mind open to new ideas. But this was not a decision that I had to think about; my natural being and my personality chose it for me. I pride myself on waking up each morning not knowing what I am going to go out and do, but more importantly, not knowing what is going to come to me. To any normal person with any sense of responsibility, this sounds absurd. This is not to say that I am not responsible, it is merely to say that I embrace the unknown. The unknown is a challenge to me, not an object of fear or avoidance. I want to go forth in my life not knowing what is going to happen next and I want to deal with the problems that arise from this journey. And this isn't just a decision I make everyday, it just happens that way. So it is only fitting that I embark on perhaps the biggest journey of my life, college, with an open and ready mind. My major is undecided, but my indecision is revered.
So yes, my mind is not made up yet and yes, I am ok with that. But for most things in the world, there is uncertainty involved. The difference between my uncertainty and say, the uncertainty of a person explaining why the sky is blue is that I embrace it. At Johns Hopkins, I plan on tackling the unknown and the uncertain and I plan on accepting the challenges that arise from doing so. But it's not really a plan, more of a guideline...
I want to go forth in my life without knowing what is going to happen next and I want to deal with the problems that arise from this journey.
Try to use more Without than Not, because a single word that repeats too many times makes the sentence not so flowing.
I suggest you write something else rather than the blue sky in your concluding paragraph, that would make it much better.
Overall, you did a terrific job!! This is one of the few essays that I actually love a lot. It's kind of deep and mysterious, then you found out this is the way life is suppose to be. Excellent work! I love it!!
angela
