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'the international communication' - Georgetown Related


Tinalove1412 2 / 3  
Jan 6, 2012   #1
It is my essay for Georgetown but my teacher said that it is unclear and I have to write it more coherently with my targets. Besides, he said that the courses I chose are not unique; also, it is too long...What should I do now? Thank you for reading and revising!

When I was 13 years old, there were a terrifyingly increasing number of beggars in our country. I read one piece of report that most of the beggars are forced to do this because someone made them disabled for beggaring. How poor they are! They could have had the chance to enjoy their lives by earning money on their own! Since that time, I became more curious at this thing for the conscience sake. There was a seed planted in my mind that one day I will give the chance to the beggars to earn their own salaries. I am longing for the University that can give what I need and finally I found the Georgetown.

I suppose I can gather some tested people who have no vital threats to the society and then educate them, train them, and employ them on the facilities I built. To fulfill this target, I have to obtain deep knowledge about the courses like Human Resource Management and International business, if I am longing to contribute more. There is a program called Landegger Program, which offers professional knowledge about the global trades and business permission, the policy making and International interaction; The Landegger Program training provides the academic foundation upon which students pursue their individual opportunities, as well as promote broader societal goals around the world. These contents must benefit me a lot to my plan and guide me to the ocean of practical facts. With the help of this kind of program, I may prepare better for my aims and, if possible, I will participate in the brilliant program.

Besides, if I have no idea about the current international affairs which exert huge impact on the International Business, I will suffer the failure during the expansion of my plan and that my words to improve the life of the low-class will be nonsense. Georgetown's Department of Government is a community of theoretically-sophisticated and policy-engaged scholars and students. In teaching, the Department seeks to provide its students with the theoretical and practical knowledge at the heart of the discipline of political science and to develop skills that will be important within and beyond the discipline. These skills include critical thinking, writing, and communicating abilities that will enable our students to be productive citizens and leaders in their chosen fields (From the Website of Georgetown University). I am not only determined to build asylum for people in my country, but also to introduce it to the whole world so I must take the International Relations to learn about the basic patterns of the global interactions which can be impart by the expert faculties in Georgetown University.

In addition, during the educating process, I am bounded to face difficulties because there will be numerous types of "employees" in my company so it must be hard to uniform and train them; also, the international communication is a big obstacle too. I am eager to take the education courses in Georgetown because I learn about that Center of Intercultural Education and Development will offer enough fund to support people to promote greater mutual understand. It encourages students to make international education program and must impart useful theories and method to educate. That's very admirable!

To be honest, I suppose that everyone will take on the social responsibility but I am trying my own thoughts and, I believe that Georgetown can definitely give what I need.
isai 12 / 111  
Jan 6, 2012   #2
Dear !

As a writer you must impress a reader and always put yourself into reader's position. If a reader comments , your courses not unique there is a reason behind. You must talk how the course which you intend to study helps in your career , community and so on. U must have a good objectives of doing this course and what are the learning outcomes after finishing. Try to concise , produce clarity and completenes in your sentences.

Regards
Isai
OP Tinalove1412 2 / 3  
Jan 6, 2012   #3
Thank you for your suggestions! but I still cannot exactly understand your point...
I don't know how to write more specifically..
As you see, I showed the reason why I am interested in my target in the first para. and indicated three courses I'd like to take separately in the following 3 para.

Which one I miss? Motives? Outcomes?


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