Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


Flowers are something I feel; One thing to represent human race


jennnyyyy 2 / 4 1  
Feb 28, 2013   #1
It's an essay on one thing to send to another plant to represent the human race. I'm not loving it so far; any suggestions?

What Represents the Human Race?



Flowers are something I feel we all take for granted. In most places, they are so common that it is easy to go on day by day not taking in all the beauty and everything it represents. However I believe that these flowers that are found so easily represent us humans perfectly. Flowers come in so many shapes and sizes, but even if they may look similar, every flower has something unique and creates different moods that no other has; just like humans. Some are poisonous or cause allergies, as not all humans are good intentionally or not. Every flower is beautiful, but deciding which is the most beautiful is in the eye of the beholder. They also need nurture, and care in the right conditions for it to grow successfully. When many flowers come together, they create something beautiful, and although humans have caused catastrophic events to earth, life and all it has to offer is something words cannot describe. I don't know one single person who hasn't gone through something difficult, but it has helped them become who they are today. Flowers are similar in that they may have gone through heavy winds, rains, or floods but it has allowed them to become stronger once they've grown. For these reasons, if I had to pick one thing to represent the human race to an outside planet, I would choose a flower as it shows both the good and bad that we humans have to offer.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4772  
Mar 25, 2017   #2
Jenny, this is not a bad first attempt at a draft. The idea of sending a flower to another planet is interesting. However, you should not just say "flowers" or "flower" in general. Each flower, as you describe, is just like a human being, with different personalities, features, and purposes for its existence. So, if you want to better focus the essay in order to make it more meaningful, choose a series of flowers to send that you feel share human traits or describe human beings. Don't generalize the approach because the aliens will not have any idea that flowers are different from one another. We know that, but they don't. So you should either pick a set of flowers and name them or, pick one flower that you feel best represents the human race. In my opinion though, since man is a helpful species, I would not send flowers but plants instead. That is because plants represent the good in man. For example, I would send an Aloe Vera plant because has healing purposes like a human doctor. As such, it would help to explain a few human traits such as being a healer and giving life. It gives life because it its leaves can be eaten, thus giving man life sustenance. A cactus plant, can represent both the good and bad in man because when threatened, it can cause injury. When dealt with properly, it offers water and relief to the thirst person. Or something like that. I think plants would better describe humans than flowers in another planet. That is just a suggestion for your consideration. A good effort overall though. I just think it should be better directed than this in terms of discussion.


Home / Writing Feedback / Flowers are something I feel; One thing to represent human race
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳