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'First, you can relax' - Stanford Roommate Essay


dominique0916 1 / 1  
Dec 22, 2011   #1
Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.

Hello, my name is Dominique. I just wanted to leave a quick note about myself, so you can get a short preview of me and know what to expect. First, you can relax - I am quite used to sharing a room. I lived almost my entire life sharing a room with my older sister, whose lifestyle is really the opposite of mine, but we still managed to be good sisters. But that does not necessarily mean I always respect the universal preference of cleanliness. About once a month I like to unleash my relaxed sensibility and reproduce my own jungle of clothes.

I love listening to all kinds of music, from new age piano to mainstream, and I am a huge fan of Pandora.com. I find it perfect to my emerging American nature that craves some sort of surprise, but still wants it within my area of control (It's kind of ironic though, since I've been "American" for only few years). So I apologize in advance if you find me in pajama clumsily waltzing, while humming Yiruma in one minute but zealously shuffling to Party Rock Anthem in the next.

I love my family, and I especially love my baby brother, Dan, who is two and a half years old now. I always find pleasure in showing his picture to others and asserting that Dan is the cutest baby of all. You might end up being the most frequent target of this passionate testimonial, so please bear with me.

In my free time, I like to jog, cook, play guitar - basically anything that will keep my mind constantly entertained - but more than anything, I love adventure. From the smallest kind as in trying out new drink in Starbucks to rather extreme ones as bungee jumping, I am an omnivorous daredevil. Perhaps you can join me and we can keep a journal of our weekly adventures for us to look back on years later.

I am looking forward to the first year in Stanford with you, and I really wish we will develop a relationship much closer than the minimum tolerance. I can't wait to see you. See you soon, roommate.
ZhoeK 5 / 173  
Dec 23, 2011   #2
Hello there Pooreum

I liked your essay. It was genuine and revealed a lot about you with a touch of humour here and there that was neither overdone or cheesy.. I like the touch at the end about minimum tolerance, thought that was a nice unique touch (I've read so many Standford Roomate Essays). Good job, I don't recall any alarming grammar mistakes, but I'm probably too tired to notice, so I'll take a look on the morrow. Overall lovely.

Hope this helps!
ChihiroLavi 4 / 52  
Dec 23, 2011   #3
Well written~
Except the ending seems a little awkward,

I can't wait to see you. See you soon,

. anything else are perfect.

Just my suggestions, hope it could help.
DrAstic - / 1  
Dec 23, 2011   #4
I agree with ChihiroLavi. Leave it at "See you soon, roommate." It sounds less generic and adds a layer of dimension to the essay. It reminds the reader who it is addressed to in addition to adding a bit of playfulness to the reader's last impression.
OP dominique0916 1 / 1  
Dec 23, 2011   #5
Thank you all for such prompt response!!
I'll make the correction you suggested :))
maybeAhoya 3 / 5  
Dec 23, 2011   #6
I thought the fact that you wrote in an "actual way of talking to your rommate" was phenomenal.
ChihiroLavi 4 / 52  
Dec 23, 2011   #7
Could you maybe help with my essays?
THX a lot~~~


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