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Prompt: Describe ex of your leadership.


brobson 1 / -  
Nov 15, 2009   #1
The question for entry into Honors College says:
Describe an example of your leadership. Be sure to describe your actions and the actions of those around you and to explain what you accomplished. 500 words

Mine is 488 words. Do I need to make it exactly 500 words?

Jules

Ever since the first time my parents took me to the local pet store, I have had an undying fascination with various domestic animals, especially those which make for unusual pets. After years of owning pets, I still had yet to find the animal that was right for me, which made the reading of Brian Jacques' Outcast of Redwall all the more timely; centered on the fictional tale of a ferret who is scorned by other animals for his species' reputation, the book made for an interesting read and an even more significant idea: If ferrets are pets, I need to know. But only a few days later I came across an article which I read to complete disbelief: ferrets were illegal to own in Dallas. I discovered that in addition to the enormous misconceptions these animals had garnered, the reasoning that the laws provided for their being outlawed made little sense at all.

Although I didn't expect any sort of response from city councilman nominee Gary Griffith, I wrote him concerning the issue and was shocked when only a few days later I received a hand-written response: "David, if I am elected to city council, I will do everything in my power to legalize ferrets." Immediately I began working on his campaign. I wanted people to know the simple reason why I supported Gary Griffith, so I wrote a letter to the local newspaper to get the issue exposed. The article was printed and appeared on the front page of the White Rocker, with the title "Gary Griffith Listens." A few weeks later I was finally able to meet Gary. He stated that the article was doing wonders for the campaign by giving people an introspective reason to vote for him. Although I tried to shrug it off as simply a kind gesture, I could tell his thanks were genuine and not obligatory. Once the votes were in, it was announced that Gary had won. The following week I received a package in the mail; it was a framed letter to me: "David, without your help, I would not be on the Dallas City Council. Thank you. Signed, Gary Griffith." Shortly after the election, I received a copy of the current Dallas City Code for Animals in the mail; the ownership of ferrets was now legal in Dallas.

Today I can walk into almost any Dallas pet shop and see ferrets everywhere; I am a proud owner of a ferret named Jules who has lived with my family for three years now. It was once illegal for 1.2 million people to own ferrets in Dallas and now the current Dallas City Code for Animals includes "regulations for the vaccination of ferrets". I am very grateful that I was able to contribute to benefiting my city and I will continue to share my story with others so that they may become proactive in their own communities as well.
JS2010 7 / 18  
Nov 15, 2009   #2
Wow, did this really happen because if so, kudos to you! This was a great essay in my opinion though I got so caught up in the story I can't really comment on any grammatical errors there may be.

But instead of saying "After years of owning pets, I still had yet to find the animal..."

You should rephrase it to "Year after year of owning pets, I still had yet to find..."

Idk I just think it sounds better but you could leave it as is. But this really is a good essay, good luck on getting in.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 17, 2009   #3
Ha ha ha, awesome, we need more people like you!! How could anyone not be impressed with this essay?

Well, actually, one reason someone might not be impressed with it is that they might disagree with you. Many people feel strongly that ferrets cannot be properly domesticated. You should cite some research that shows that ferrets can indeed be happy as pets. this ACCOMPLISHMENT is so impressive, the essay deserve to be supported with a citation or two. Cite some articles!

cababstractsplus.org/abstracts%5C/Abstract.aspx?AcNo=1982016 6164


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