Prompt: How have your interests and related experiences influenced the major you have selected in the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences?
When I was born, I could have lost my mom and dad. The doctors said my mom would not be able to survive giving birth to me on account of her weak heart. They were wrong and the medicine they gave her was enough to help her survive.
A few days after I was born, my dad got into a construction accident where he fell multiple stories, injuring his lower body. The doctors said that his legs would have to be amputated on account of the many seriously fracture bones as well as a broken hip. The next day, when blood was still going to his legs, he was rushed to the operating room.
A year after my birth my mom gave birth to a healthy baby boy, my brother. Today, both of my parents are alive and well. My dad can walk on his own two legs. While the doctors were wrong at first, medical and biological science still helped saved my parents. Thank God.
My parents raised me to be a person of faith, inquiry, and open-mindedness. My Christian faith helped teach me humility and faith while my parents also taught me to be curious and open-minded. I opened my mind to science and what I learned was truly awe-inspiring. This universe is truly a masterpiece that we continually try to understand and even control. Yet, there is always so much more out there, even things that we will never be able to comprehend. But for me, even studying a bit of the masterpiece is enough to humble me and put me in awe.
I have never considered science to contradict Christianity. Rather, science is a compliment to my faith as it gives me a unique perspective on science, one where I see science as a means of revealing God's grandeur.
My interests in science eventually became more specific as my love for the biological science grew. Some prefer to peer outwards, into the ever expanding universe. I prefer to peer inwards, into cells, into life. As a child, I would use a microscope to try to find out what saliva and boogers were made of. I even used Q-tips to remove such material before placing them onto a slide. I still have an interest in doing things like that but in the future, I want to be the person behind a microscope and other equipment trying to find out what is wrong with my patient.
I don't want anyone to lose a loved one like I could have. I want to help people live. I want to combine this passion to help others and my passion for the biological sciences in order to become a doctor someday. I want to help people survive until they can die peacefully of old age after living a fulfilling life. The biological sciences major at Cornell's College of Agriculture and Life Sciences is perfect for helping me on my journey to become a doctor.
Overall an effective essay in the sense that it clearly states the life experiences that you have head which have led to your interest in life sciences. There is a redundancy in your first 2 paragraphs as you use the term "on account of" multiple times. Try using other terms that mean the same thing to avoid repetition. For example, you could say that your father almost lost his legs "due to" his multiple injuries. The later portion that deals with your Christian faith in comparison to scientific learning is not really needed in this essay. It deviated the essay from the prompt provided and changed the direction of the middle part of your writing. Rather than discussing science and religion, just go directly to how you used a microscope as a child. That is the part of the essay that brought the essay back into alignment with the prompt requirements anyway. The essay has a very strong finish that works well as a conclusion to the provided prompt.
