For the Stanford prompt: "What matters to you and why?", I am torn between two essays. I am not sure which one is better so any opinions are greatly appreciated. Feel free to also correct me on grammar and structure. Thank you! :]
Essay No. 1
"Doshite sonani taberuno hayaino-Why do you eat your food so quickly?" As I take my last bite of curry, I look up from my empty bowl to my family. To my surprise, their bowls are still half full. I let out an embarrassed chuckle as my obaa-chan (grandmother) urges me to eat a second serving. I forgot, I am in Japan right now. Voltaire stated, "Nothing would be more tiresome than eating and drinking if God had not made them a pleasure as well as a necessity." Nothing is more universal than food. Although it began as a necessity, food has grown to be an art, a cultural identity, and a way of living. We don't just eat to sustain ourselves anymore. We consume for pleasure and entertainment. Growing up in a US territory and being raised by Asian parents presented me with two different outlooks on how food is eaten. Through observations, I realize that Americans take eating as a daily, menial task. They eat their food with little thought and often, while doing other activities. Whenever I dine in a restaurant, at least one customer has his eyes glued to his phone or laptop. He mindlessly gobbles up his meal without taking the time to enjoy it. In contrast, my parents have taught me the importance of enjoying what I eat. In Japan, much time is spent in the preparation of food because they eat not only with their mouth, but with their eyes too. Food preparation has become an art and the Japanese take their time in eating to fully appreciate their meal. America boasts a colossal number of fast food chains and this addiction to "quick eating" results into a society that has little appreciation for the small things in life. After the curry incident, I reflected on how I ate my meals. Was I eating just for the sake of eating, or was I truly appreciating food by savoring each bite? In life, we have to slow down in order to find the pleasures in what we do. Take it from the Japanese-sit down and eat food, not like it is a daily task, but as if it were a painting you were admiring. Eat not to survive, but eat because food is full of art, culture, history, and flavor. If one can make a necessity into a luxury, surely his outlook in life will be improved. "Itadakimasu! Let's eat!"
Essay No. 2
I should have been practicing for SATs, but I chose to help my mother grade her students' papers instead. I was supposed to watch Transformers 3 with friends, but I skipped out to volunteer as a swimming instructor. I was supposed to be done with this essay. Instead I helped other students with theirs. Sacrifice is a word I have been acquainted with my entire life. I grew up learning that other people's needs are sometimes more important than mine. Just this year, my mother became a science teacher for a local middle school. I have never seen her as overworked as she is now. I would often find her asleep on the couch, still wearing her uniform. Worried about her health, I confronted her as to why she started working. "College tuition isn't going to pay itself," she replied. I realized that my mother sacrificed sleepless nights in hopes that someday I would be able to attend college. Although I was already well aware of the importance of sacrifice, my mother's act of love encouraged me to put the welfare of others before my own. I, in return, help my mother whenever I can by grading tests or tutoring my younger brother. From past experiences, I have learned that sacrifice does not necessarily leave you with nothing. On the contrary, life has always found several ways to bless me for my acts of selflessness. Whenever a friend desperately needs somebody to talk to, my ears are always ready to listen. I will put down my American Government textbook and comfort a friend who is in despair. In the end, what is more important: acing a test, or helping someone turn his life around? Believe me, I want nothing more in life than to be successful. But I could never forgive myself if I put my needs before others in order to reach my goals. Perhaps that is why I want to become a doctor who is dedicated to saving lives. In the future, I should have been spending Christmas with family and friends. Instead, I rushed to the hospital to attend to an emergency. Again, life blesses me by assuring that the young child I saved will live to see a new year.
Second essay: Its good but I think in a way you present yourself as if you dont care much about yourself. I do understand that your trying to present yourself as a selfless individual but i think you overdo it. And i think it kind of hurts your essay. For instance: Its not that honorable to ditch your friends. You present yourself as unreliable by ditching them and going to volunteer. And not practicing for SAT's isnt that good either. because at the end of the day, you want to do the best you can with your life but if you dont practice your SAT's then you will not get the 2300 that you will need to get in to Stanford. I hope you kind of get what im saying. Find some other examples that dont HURT your essay.
Its good to be selfless and i can relate to you because I do the same things you do but in reality Stanford wants to admit a potential "Steve Jobs" instead of a Mother Theresa. Not that Mother Theresa is bad but thats just reality.
Your goal is to get the admission officers to say we want her/him.
p.s Mother theresa is one of my heroes.
Could you please read through mine if you can.
