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Why Yale? - Interdisciplinary approach of Health Studies


littlechef 10 / 33  
Dec 23, 2010   #1
I have written two drafts. Any preferences...?

1. A Californian since birth, I would love to explore outside boundaries and immerse myself into the liberation offered by the Yale experience. As a pre-medical student, I am attracted to the interdisciplinary foci in Yale's Health Studies program, from analyses of physiological processes in Immunology to an appreciation of medicine's human aspect in Anthropology of the Body. Beyond the classes, I long to embrace the inexhaustible potential to learn in New Haven's culturally vibrant community. --> too specific on the academics?

2. Having lived in California for my entire life, I would love to explore outside boundaries and immerse myself into the freedom offered by Yale. With a passion for medicine, I desire to unite the exploration of science's intricate details with an appreciation for the unique human aspect by studying in Yale's esteemed Anthropology department. In addition to its academics, I yearn to embrace Yale's inexhaustible opportunities, opening my eyes to the world in New Haven's culturally vibrant community.

Anything else I should add?

Thank you in advance!
rajeshaaidu 2 / 31  
Dec 23, 2010   #2
I think, second one is better.
Thanks!!!
aditiji 1 / 9  
Dec 23, 2010   #3
I agree, I believe the second one is better. The thing with this is, there's very little space to add anything. If you feel there is something else you find more important, then add that by taking something out. But as it is, it sounds fine.


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