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Supplement essays for Brown's engineering; '\I was not born to be an engineer'


shinhwab 3 / 8  
Jan 1, 2010   #1
PROMPTS
To be completed by applicants whose primary interest is Engineering; please address each question seperately. We also suggest limiting your total response to 500 words.

1. Many applicatns to collge are unsure about eventual majors. What factors led you to an interest in the field of engineering?
2. What experiences beyond school work have broadened your interest in Engineering?
3. Brwon offers programs in Biomedical, Chemical, Civil, Computer, Electrical, Materials, and Mechanical Engineering. Because there is a common core curriculum within Engineering, students need not select a specific area until their junior year. we are curious to know, however, if any particular program within Engineering presently appeals to you. If so, please discuss that choice

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The prompt itself it really long.
I just wanted some feedback about the content and grammatical errors!
Thank you!!!!!!!!!!
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Not to disappoint anyone, but I was not born to be an engineer - for fifteen years of my life, at least. I have none of the usual Big Artillery: I am not a boy, or fascinated with computers; have never played with Lego blocks, watched transformers in my childhood, or participated in any science fairs in elementary school. My hatred against math and science was embedded in me ever since I failed to understand the concept of functions. However, my first engineering experience in ROP Rapid Product Development class changed my whole entire view of the world of engineering.

In this newly created class, I experienced what it was like to be an engineer in a similar environment of being the only female student in the class. Because it was the first time using the 3D program, my teacher, Mr. Musgrove and I learned by trial and error. I started the tutorial out with making a simple dice. I took measurements on the actual model. I designed my own dice in Solidworks, printed it out in 3D printer that used the fine powder, and laid it out on the paper. As the project got complicated, I divided and worked on different parts and assembled it altogether at the end. My outstanding design confronted the disadvantage of being the only girl. By the end of the year, an old-fashioned flashlight, a Mickey Mouse light switch cover, an adjustable car rack for every SUV joined my product collection. Eventually, I spent most of my time working on project and wanted to pursue my career in the field of engineering.

Volunteering in Discovery Science Center also strengthened my enthusiasm toward engineering. For Women Explorers workshop series, I helped Jackie Jaron, an aerospace engineer who currently works for Northrop Grumman, with her presentation. When she told the audience how she became an engineer and her trainings in NASA's "Weightless Wonders," my heart was pounding like a steam engine as I imagined myself in the similar picture. Although her lecture was about less than an hour long, my dream of becoming one like her was determined.

Although I am open to all areas of engineering, mechanical engineering presently appeals to me. There is so much I could explore in mechanical engineering ranging from automotive to manufacturing. It is particularly fascinating because I could leave a greater impact with a little detailed idea while working with machineries used in daily basis.
EF_Susan - / 2,364 12  
Jan 1, 2010   #2
First of all, I think you should scrap the first sentence, or at least reword it for the sake of clarity. It could start, "For the first fifteen years of my life, I had absolutely no interest in..."

My hatred for math and science...

...Rapid Product Development class changed my whole entire view of the...

Because it was the first time using the 3D program, my teacher, Mr. Musgrove and I learned by trial and error.

I started the tutorial out by making a simple dice.

...worked on different parts and assembled it all together at the end.
My outstanding design confronted the disadvantage?? This doesn't make sense to me.

...most of my time working on projects and wantingto pursue my career in the field of engineering.

Although her lecture was about less than an hour long, my dream of becoming one like her was determined.

...detailed idea while working with machinery used on a
daily basis.
OP shinhwab 3 / 8  
Jan 2, 2010   #3
Dear Susan,
Thanks for your comment and critique.
The first few lines were from a book, So Brave, Young, and Hansome by Leif Enger.(not exactly... but it's pretty much the same...) would that be still a problem...????????

if you like to see the reference,

books.google.com/books?id=L2wHrUZc7JcC&printsec=frontcover&dq=leif+enger&hl=ko&cd=1#v=onepage&q=&f=false

Thank you!!!


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