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The Economics is my favorite subject and I'm interested in CO-OP Management program - Short essays


sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 25, 2009   #1
I am applying to U of T and they asked to answer following questions in less than 100 words. Please proofread, check for grammatical, punctuation errors and word orders. Please kindly check if I need to capitalize any words and leave your comment after checking.

What is your favorite subject and why?

Since Grade 7, Economics has been my favorite among all the other subjects. I was very fascinated to discover how I am implementing the principles of economics in my daily life. Basically, it is a very important subject because it helps me to understand many human interactions like production and sale of goods and services. It is also a dynamic and interesting subject that will expand my understanding of the world as well as my reasoning and problem solving abilities. Moreover, economics is closely connected with vital subjects like sociology, politics, business studies, mathematics, psychology and history.

Why are you interested in this program?

CO-OP Management is interactive, challenging, interesting and practical which will enable me to know how people think and act in the workplace and, thus, assist me to become a better leader. As management analyses the administration of business, it will equip me well to operate skillfully as a manager in today's rapidly changing world along with increased globalization. In addition to management, this program also gives a firm base on Economics and also includes co-operative option, which will allow me to apply the theories in work-related situations as well as earn excellent salary simultaneously.

What experiences and skills might you bring to this field?

I have been engaged in a couple of activities to broaden my horizon and gain a competitive edge in my business career. I registered in Acid Survivors Foundation to participate in various projects. The important things that I learned there are completing tasks before the deadline and business ethics, which will immensely benefit me in my professional career. As I am planning to setup a company in Canada, I started learning French because this language will help me to diversify and target a greater segment of customers whose mother tongue is French.

This question is based on volunteer service.
Describe in more details the responsibilities and skills you developed.

I developed several skills as I enrolled in Acid Survivors Foundation for six months. I worked with several projects to create awareness about acid violence. I had to call various donor organizations, individuals and media partners to update addresses and contact details before any events like press conferences and other presentations. This greatly enhanced my knowledge of communication and demonstration skills. Then, with the help of other voluntary members, I have send letters to the affiliated partners and stalk holders. This helped me to learn the vital skills of teamwork and collaboration, which are highly emphasized in business jobs.

Describe any awards or recognitions you received based on your ECA.

I received a certificate of participation for performing in a cultural program called 'Ekushe Program' held in February last year. This program was arranged in memory of 21st February, which is a very important day for our nation because, in 1952, many lives were sacrificed in this day to establish Bengali as our mother tongue. Moreover, it is recognized as "International Mother Language Day" in 17th November 1999 in the 30th General meeting of UNESCO. In this program, I recited a few verses in the beginning and, later, joined the national anthem to mark the end of the program.

Thank u all
Have a nice day :)
avih 2 / 5  
Jan 25, 2009   #2
Since Grade 7, Economics has been my favorite among all the other subjects - Economics has always been my favorite subject.
Obacho 1 / 8  
Jan 25, 2009   #3
Then, with the help of other voluntary members, I have send letters to the affiliated partners and STOCK ...
good luck :)
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 25, 2009   #4
For the one about economics, it is great already! A reflective sentence at the end would help, though... perhaps connect econ. with your intended course of study at this school to which you're applying.

CO-OP Management is interactive, challenging, interesting and practical, which will enable me to know how people think and act in the workplace and, thus, assist me in becoming a better leader.

In addition to management, this program also provides a firm base in Economics including a co-operative option, which will allow me to apply the theories in work-related situations as well as earn an excellent salary simultaneously.

I worked on several projects designed to create awareness about acid violence.
(what is acid violence?)

Then, with the help of other volunteers , I sent letters to the affiliated partners and stock holders.

This program was arranged in memory of 21st February, which is a very important day for our nation because, in 1952, many lives were sacrificed on this day to establish Bengali as our mother tongue.

good luck!!

:)
EF_Sean 6 / 3,491  
Jan 25, 2009   #5
You might want to explain what the Acid Survivors Foundation is at some point. I had to look it up in wikipedia, and I notice Kevin put "(what is acid violence?)" in bold in his post, too. Neither of us are particularly ignorant or uneducated, so I'm guessing that, outside of the countries where acid attacks have become a serious social problem, the issue just hasn't been covered by the mainstream media. This means that admins officers may well not have heard of this either, and with thousands of applications to process, I doubt they'll take time to look it up. This means you'll have to do some explaining if you want the reviewers who read your essays to fully understand how important your involvement with the Foundation really is.
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 26, 2009   #6
But the word limit is only up to 100 words, brother. :(

I emphasized more on my development than ASF because that is what they told me to write, pls tell me if u have any suggestions.
EF_Sean 6 / 3,491  
Jan 26, 2009   #7
It shouldn't take too many extra words to explain ASF -- "a foundation meant to help those who have experienced assaults in which they have had acid thrown at them, which is a major problem in some countries." You'd have to cut a bit to make room for it, but it should be possible

Some fixes for those minor errors in grammar you were talking about:

My writing skills have always been outstanding because I was educated in an excellent English school. Three of my articles were published in The Daily Star , a famous English newspaper.
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 26, 2009   #8
I have corrected now. Hope it makes sense.

My writing skills have always been outstanding because I was educated in an excellent English school. Three of my articles were published in The Daily Star, a famous English newspaper.
OP sakibniaz 2 / 9  
Jan 27, 2009   #9
Corrected version: please check for any kind of errors and pls suggest if I can use some better words.

My writing skills have always been outstanding because I was educated in an excellent English school. Three of my articles were published in The Daily Star, a famous English newspaper. Overall, in writing, my ideas are strong and the message is clear. However, I admit that I make some minor errors in grammar and punctuations. Apart from this, I also possess some useful communication skills. I can adjust my verbal presentation according to the age and background of the people. But sometimes, it becomes difficult for me to make them understand if they don't have any idea about the topic beforehand.

Thank u
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 27, 2009   #10
However, I admit that I make some minor errors in grammar and punctuation.
You don't need the "s" at the end of punctuation.

I can adjust my verbal presentation according to the age and background of the people . my audience might sound better.

I think you might need just one more sentence at the end to sum it all up.

Good luck :)


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