Prompt: The quality of Rice's academic life and the Residential College System is heavily influenced by the unique life experiences and cultural traditions each student brings. What perspective do you feel that you will contribute to life at Rice?
Essay:
I could sense countless pairs of eyes seemingly scorching a hole in me as I shuffled down the sidewalk. Each step I took brought me nearer the door that led to the place I had been warned against. It was a place of corruption, sinfulness, and evilness; a place where children were immoral and disrespectful. At least, this was the portrayal I had been given of public school. At first I was terrified of these dreadful creatures who defied all authority and spewed profanities from their mouths. But as time went by, and weeks became months, I grew semi-accustomed to their way of life. Even though I didn't agree with them, I could look at them through eyes not judging them on their initial impressions. I interacted with them and began to behave more and more like them. I joined the varsity volleyball team, the Beta Club, and many other activities and actually started to be partial to my new surroundings.
I never knew how much I was altered in that first year at public school until I went to my friend's birthday party. She was still home-schooled and so was every other girl there that day. I was initially astounded by the civility shown to me upon my entrance; I was shown in and presented a seat at the dining table, where the other guests were already sipping lemonade and nibbling cookies. I was amazed to hear courteous, quaint remarks in the most lady-like tones. Had they always sounded like this? Did I used to sound like this? I couldn't remember, but surely I had. Then why did I feel so out of place now? Such a short time ago I was one of them. I had only been in public school for a year, yet somehow I felt that my reputation was already marred. I was transformed. I was not the same little, home-schooled girl I had once been. I felt looked down upon in a small way. They would never have actually shown any incivility towards me, I knew that, but I could feel their distrust at what I had become.
The following Monday, I relived part of my first day of school. The people surrounding me were again strangers. Every profanity, every disrespectful word, and every irreverent comment made me cringe. For the second time in seventy-two hours I felt like an alien - an outcast. This was not where I belonged either. The public schoolers saw me as a little-miss-goody-two-shoes. The home-schoolers saw me as a girl who had gone to the dark side. By attempting to have the best of both worlds, I had become a pariah in both.
Through being a part of both cultures, I learned to see things from different perspectives. I am now able to see both sides of the picture and implement characteristics of both ways of life in my daily routines. I am can effectively accept the views of others and am open to new ideas and theories as a result, without questioning my morals or becoming someone I am not. I can relate to people of other cultures and learn from them. Adaptability has now become a part of my character through learning and experience, although it was not an innate quality in me. When judging things in my life, I now always remember the words of the famous author, George Ade: "One never can tell from the sidewalk just what the view is to some one on the inside, looking out".
Even though I didn't agree with them, I could look at them through nonjudgmental eyes.
Great essay but I think you could make some changes to the beginning and the end to respond better to the prompt. Can you start by mentioning cultures to which you were exposed in school? And your own culture, too... They ask about "the unique life experiences and cultural traditions" you might bring. I think you need to address that a little more.
However, what you have written is very clear and eloquent.
